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8 DEC 03: SIDE DISHES

Sunday was a travel day, as I drove to metro Atlanta on some personal matters. I was surprised to find plenty of open parking spaces around Shannon Mall in Union City - which may mean people don't celebrate Pearl Harbor Day the way they once did.

It wouldn't be a trip to the Atlanta area without at least one encounter with a beggar. "HOMELESS, I NEED CHANGE. THANKS," said the man's small cardboard sign at I-85 and Cleveland Avenue. If this man really wants a home in Atlanta, he'll need enough change to fill several giant trash cans.

I dared to roll down my car window, to get more details about the homeless man. "You need change. Why?"

"You want me to say?!?!" The man apparently didn't expect this. Since it was Sunday midday, the freeway traffic wasn't really noisy at all.

"No. The sign says you need change. Why?"

"Breakfast." Apparently the homeless man didn't have a watch, either - because it was shortly after noon.

I motioned to the homeless man to follow me to a Kroger store across the street from his corner. This used to be my neighborhood supermarket, but I hadn't been inside it in years. The homeless man obviously had - because he knew where to get a meal better than I did.

The wing stand in the front of the Kroger Citi-Center was closed on this Sunday. This alone was a surprise to me - because I really didn't think Truett Cathy of Chick-fil-A had that much clout in Atlanta.

The homeless man walked me over to the deli section of the Kroger store, where he ordered a big piece of fried chicken for himself. He wasn't interested in the prepared boxes of cold chicken sitting next to the deli counter, even though they had more pieces inside. Just because the sun was out did NOT mean a December heat wave was on the way.

With a 20-ounce bottle of Sprite tossed in, I wound up paying about three dollars for the homeless man's Sunday dinner. I did NOT give the man any change, either -- even though I probably would have been safe doing it. Atlanta still doesn't have Sunday liquor sales....

If that homeless man had been in Columbus, I might have offered to take the man in for the evening. But I was 100 miles from home -- and there was no afternoon Falcons game on the radio, to distract me from any delusional comments he might make.

Compared with Atlanta, Columbus doesn't really have a problem with homeless beggars on street corners. But other strange things have popped up along the roadside in recent days....

+ Victory Drive has a corner where you can buy recliners for $129. If the chairs are out in the elements like that, can I assume they're treated with Scotch-Gard?

+ Bradley Park Drive has a corner filled with what appear to be mini-motor scooters -- and a sign promises you can put them in a form of layaway until December 21. Oh really?! Where are they stored -- and has that trailer's tires been cut, so they can't be hauled away to Texas?

(Remind me not to shop at the Publix on Bradley Park Drive for the next couple of weeks. That's probably where the motor scooter customers are taking test drives - in the store aisles.)

+ Veterans Parkway has a corner where you can buy all sorts of flags. There's no better way to send a "peace on earth" message at this time of year than a Confederate flag in someone's stocking.

BLOG UPDATE: Auburn's football team accepted a bid Sunday night to meet Wisconsin in the "Music City Bowl." What an amazing, convenient choice for the Auburn trustees! That game is in Nashville - just a short three-hour drive down the interstate from Louisville.

Meanwhile, Georgia's Bulldogs will head for Orlando New Year's Day to take on Purdue This is amazing as well - as days later, much of the University will take on GOVERNOR Perdue at the state legislature.

(Nobody asked me, but.... why do they play the "Capital One Bowl" in Orlando? Shouldn't this bowl game be in Atlanta? After all, It IS a state capital.)

We don't want to overlook Georgia Tech, which will play a January bowl game in Boise, Idaho. But let's face it: 99 percent of the country WILL overlook that game, for good reason....

Georgia Tech will take on Tulsa, in Boise's "Humanitarian Bowl." Both teams will show how humanitarian they are on the morning of the game - by shoveling snow off the field.

In the big leagues, Atlanta beat Carolina shortly after midnight today on an interception return. But why did the Georgia Dome signs refer to the Falcon quarterback as "Mike Vick," after he claimed he wanted to be called Michael? I'm not even going to call him Vickie....

SCHEDULED TUESDAY: Wait a second: "Second" isn't on Second?....