9 NOV 07: WATER UNDER THE PERISCOPE

Thursday was a sunny, cool and comfortable day in Columbus - but once again it didn't rain. If this keeps up much longer, people will start calling Russell a "dry county."

The public water feud between Georgia and Alabama seems to have calmed down for now. But have you wondered where Florida stands? After all, all the water which flows down the Chattahoochee River through Columbus winds up there. I'm still not sure how many mussels they send to Columbus seafood shops in response.

We thank a blog reader for sending us some e-mail being passed around the Florida panhandle. They explain why Floridians don't want the flow of water down the Chattahoochee River reduced. And amazingly, the word "kayak" doesn't appear once in any of it.

The primary e-mail purportedly was sent by a "fishing guide" service in Apalachicola to Florida Governor Charlie Crist -- who we must say looked the most dashing, among all the politicians who gathered in Washington a couple of weeks ago. If the writers' strike keeps up, Crist could star in a reality series to replace "CSI: Miami."

But anyway: a woman who helps run a fishing guide service writes this e-mail -- and keep in mind that the Chattahoochee River changes names at the Florida line:

Most of the 30 or so fishing guides that we book trips for not only make their living taking people fishing but they are also 3rd & 4th generation Oystermen, shrimpers, commercial fishermen, etc. (Most people who live here find it necessary to hold 2 or 3 jobs - My husband & I are also realtors) Their wives and families depend on the health of the Apalachicola River to sustain a way of life that is barely up to poverty standards in most other communities. This entire county is predominately based on seafood and fishing which attracts tourism. Even a foot less water sent down the Apalachicola River will have a devastating effect on life here as we know it, now and for future generations. We are also experiencing a major drought situation and are making do as necessary. If you allow Atlanta, due to their poor forethought and lack of planning to keep the water that we must have to keep the estuary alive, the entire Gulf of Mexico will be horribly negatively effected, not just the oyster industry, which has already felt the effects of the drought. Please do your homework, listen to the marine biologists who regularly study our pristine estuary which is the nursery to the gulf of mexico and please, please don't sell us down the river!!

Apalachicola is in Gulf County, which my road atlas shows is almost entirely swampland. So you'd think the drought would give local realtors a lot more land to sell, to make extra money.

There's a national wildlife refuge near the mouth of the Apalachicola River - so I would guess fishing is limited in that area already. But there's nothing like a drought to make even the oyster market clam up....

But isn't it a bit of a stretch to claim less Chattahoochee River water will harm "the entire Gulf of Mexico?" The gulf is rather big, stretching from southwest Florida to eastern Mexico. And don't we need to leave some room for all that melting polar ice water, from global warming?

Of course, Georgia officials would say the water-sharing problem is NOT due to a lack of planning. They blame the Army Corps of Engineers for bad lake measurements and faulty figuring. There's a reason why you don't see Corps members working the sidelines at football games.

The funny thing is that Chattahoochee River water flows to a lake in Gulf County, Florida, north of Apalachicola - and it's called "Dead Lake." For water from Dead Lake to have such a major "effect on life" sounds like something from the TV series "Six Feet Under."

Attached to this e-mail is a "community message" from the Apalachicola Bay Area Chamber of Commerce, as well as an "Oyster and Seafood Industry Task Force." It starts by saying the river needs my help NOW -- but don't worry, I have no plans to swim in it.

Facts: The U.S. Army Corps of Engineers has proposed cutting current water flows out of Georgia by 517 million gallons a day -- starting in 2 weeks. That would lower the river level by another foot from the already record low. The river is dangerously salty and we have already lost many oyster beds in the western part of the bay.

Even worse, under the proposed change Georgia would get to keep more water in reservoirs even after the drought breaks. If Gov. Crist does not stop the new plan, river flows could stay at the current low levels for years, even if storms dump gallons of rain on Georgia. That could be a death sentence for the river and bay, and cause many, many people to lose their jobs.

Florida officials say Gov. Crist has not agreed to the plan, but Crist and some other Florida politicians are being awfully quiet -- silent, almost -- about the threat our river and bay faces. Many news reports and knowledgeable sources in government say that Gov. Crist did agree to some sort of deal last week in Washington, when he met with the governors of Georgia and Alabama. Unfortunately, both those states now support a reduction in the flow to the river.

Georgia has successfully convinced many people that the city of Atlanta is about to run out of water. Georgia officials did not enact any water conservation measures until October. In fact, according to the Corps of Engineers, Lake Lanier has about 280 days of water left - even if there is no rain at all. Plus, there are other options for Atlanta.

Call or email Gov. Crist and our federal officials and tell them to adamantly oppose any cuts in the water flow for the Apalachicola River.

Of all the arguments I've heard in this fight, this is the first time I've heard the river declared salty. Now we may have to conserve not only how much water we use, but how much popcorn and pretzels we eat.

The Florida faction fears any change in the water-sharing plan will be permanently in Georgia's favor. Maybe the answer is to have some kind of "adjustable rate" of water flow - but hasn't that sort of thinking led to thousands of foreclosed houses?

To claim Georgia "did not enact any water conservation measures until October" is a bit misleading. Columbus and all of North Georgia have been under odd-even watering schedules for years. Even if a deluge comes next week, there still will be plenty of work for ChemLawn to keep front yards painted green.

Georgia Governor Sonny Perdue is challenging the revised Corps of Engineers measurement about how much water is in Lake Lanier. He says the Corps is counting "dead pools," which he doubts contain drinkable water. I knew the governor flew helicopters, but I've never anyone describe him as a scuba diver.

As the great Southeast water fight continues, a surprising news story emerged Thursday in Talbot County. A woman plans to begin selling bottled water, from a spring that's been running on her family's property for 120 years. How did they hide this from Georgia governors for so long?

Mary Ogletree's spring is located in a fitting place - the little town of Box Springs. When I first moved to Columbus, I wondered if that town gained its name from making beds....

Mary Ogletree plans to put "Kelly Springs" water on sale next year. That could well be the name of the spring, but I'm wondering if it's appropriate. Her local competition will be Callaway Blue - so will confused shoppers think Kelly Springs water is green?

Mary Ogletree plans to sell more than spring water. Her Kelly Springs brands will include Sweet Georgia Nectars, and "Diva Tea." I can't wait to see Lindsey Lohan and Britney Spears carry that around Hollywood, and prove what most of us have suspected for years.

State Senator Ed Harbison attended the announcement ceremony for Kelly Springs water. He said it's "absolutely wonderful" that Mary Ogletree is selling her spring water - which is interesting, because her family gave away the water for free during another drought in the 1960's. Is Harbison turning into a profit-loving Republican on us?

E-MAIL UPDATE: Thursday's InBox also included a comment about a recent scare at Columbus State University:

I can't believe there was not more coverage of the older student at CSU who made the bomb threats..I sure am thankful the didn't get to use the 2 rifles,2handguns and compound bow and 100 round of ammo found in his car in a CSU parking lot...THANKS CAMPUS COPS!!..Maybe he was headed to Northside Pawn for a little turkey day money..

This suspected college bomber is a man in his mid-forties, who's majoring in biology. You have to admit that using a handgun to dissect a frog would be a groundbreaking approach....

The attorney for suspect Lawrence Price claims all the weapons and ammunition were in his vehicle because he loves to hunt. It's enough to make the Columbus State University mascot go into hiding for a few days.

But Thursday's Ledger-Enquirer reported Lawrence Price has confessed to making bomb threats -- and supposedly did it because he needed more time to prepare for a test. Not even Brian Nichols in Atlanta has stooped to that level....

Now let's take aim at some Thursday news headlines:

+ The low temperature in Columbus was 31 degrees F., giving the city its earliest freeze in 14 years. I hope you cold-weather fans enjoyed it -- because if the Georgia House Speaker gets his way, there won't even be a property tax freeze in Columbus much longer.

+ WRBL spotted several new signs along the Columbus Riverwalk which say: "Caution - alligator habitat." This raises a big and obvious question. How long were these signs posted before the Georgia-Florida football game?

+ Columbus Mayor Jim Wetherington received the "Eagle Award of Excellence" from the Georgia Department of Corrections, for his years as Commissioner. I'm a bit surprised he didn't also receive an award from Sheriff Ralph Johnson - because hiring away Sheriff Gene Hodge to be an aide in Atlanta was the best career jump Johnson's ever had.

+ A going-away roast was held for Russell County Emergency Management Director Chance Corbett. One speaker revealed Corbett once wrecked a sheriff's patrol car. Apparently Sheriff Tommy Boswell had mercy on him - because the Phenix City Manager might have had him arrested for reckless driving.

+ The organizers of God Bless Fort Benning announced Dr. Laura Schlessinger will appear next weekend. Now hold on here. "Dr. Laura" is making a public appearance on a Saturday - the "Jewish Sabbath"?! She must not be as hardline Orthodox as she sounds on radio.

+ The group Phenix City Beautiful presented an award to the new CharBroil restaurant, for being completely smoke-free. I'm assuming the staff checked the kitchen carefully, and made sure the chef doesn't even use liquid smoke....

+ Alabama election officials announced Ohio Congressman Dennis Kucinich did NOT qualify for the state's Presidential primary. That's a shame, because you'd think a lot of Alabamians would vote for Kucinich - the ones who have seen UFO's, just like he has.

+ Carver hammered Hardaway 47-12, to finish the high school football regular season 10-0. I'm starting to think the Carver Tigers should add an extra contest next fall - and challenge the winner of the Morehouse Maroon Tiger-Tuskegee Golden Tiger game.

+ Instant Message to anyone wondering if I made it three wins in the last four poker nights Thursday: I'll keep the answer brief - from first to worst. And I don't mean I ate bratwurst.

THE BLOG OF AMERICA: Our focus continues to widen nationally, because the Writers' Guild remains on strike. That means no late-night monologues - and as Jay Leno noted along a picket line the other day: "Do you notice suddenly how unfunny I am?" Fans of David Letterman's talk show would argue that problem started about 15 years ago.

+ A Roman Catholic priest was arrested, on charges of stalking "Late Night" host Conan O'Brien. If this charge is true, it's truly sad - because I don't think O'Brien is anywhere near as young as this priest might think.

+ Organizers of next year's Beijing Olympics denied rumors that Bibles will be banned from the games. Most of the world's pole vaulters and platform divers are breathing a big sigh of relief today....

+ ABC News reported the Taliban seems to have taken control of Pakistan's "Swat Valley." President Pervez Musharraf will have trouble reclaiming this area - since it likely has Swat teams all over the place.

(Have you noticed the video from Pakistani TV of President Musharraf? There are numbers constantly on the left side of the screen - and those numbers update the score of a World Cup cricket match, between Pakistan and India! So if you see "target 322," it's NOT a secret code for aiming nuclear weapons.)

+ We learned at post time that former Pakistan Prime Minister Benazir Bhutto has been placed under house arrest. This could lead to a replay of what happened several years ago -- when she left the country, and became Benazir Booted.

+ NBC's Ann Curry became probably the first journalist in history to reach the South Pole. Television news can't possibly get much lower than this. At least not on a map....

+ O.J. Simpson appeared in a Las Vegas courtroom for a preliminary hearing. Someday a cable news channel will take the obvious next step in its coverage of this story - and have Minute Maid sponsor "O.J."

+ Former New York Police Commissioner Bernard Kerik was indicted. One-time colleague turned Presidential candidate Rudolph Giuliani responded by saying when he was New York Mayor, "I made about 100,000 decisions.... some of them were wrong." Don't you wonder what Giuliani's two former wives thought of that comment?

+ An audit by the National Archives revealed as many as 80,000 items are missing from the Ronald Reagan Presidential Library. I didn't think Republican candidates needed good-luck charms....

+ Federal Reserve Chairman Ben Bernanke told a Congressional hearing the U.S. economy is likely to slow markedly in the coming months. In fact, the higher price of gasoline might make drivers slow down markedly - to get better mileage.

+ A sheriff's deputy in Norfolk, Virginia was declared the tallest man in the U.S. by the Guinness Book of Records. George Bell stands seven-foot-eight - and when he gets home from work, he'll probably have messages on his answering machine from several pro basketball teams.

+ College basketball fans were abuzz about a huge opening-week upset. Kentucky lost at home by 16 points to Gardner-Webb. I never knew Spud Webb had started his own college - much less a basketball team.

+ Ryan Seacrest tried to set the record, uh, straight about his private life. He told ABC's "Nightline" he is NOT gay. OK - but has Seacrest ever appeared with Senator Larry Craig?

+ Two women told the TMZ telecast they saw George Clooney shove Fabio in the chest, at a Los Angeles restaurant. To borrow from Fabio's famous commercial: I can't believe Clooney's not battered.

SCHEDULED THIS WEEKEND: Thoughts about stupid rope tricks.... a question about satellite TV.... and will some sports bar PLEASE show the Kansas-Oklahoma State game?....

Today's main topic came in part from a blog reader's tip. To offer a story tip, advertise to our readers, make a PayPal donation or comment on this blog, write me - but be warned, I may post your e-mail comment and offer a reply.

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