8 NOV 07: MISTAKE BY THE LAKE

Now don't get the wrong idea here -- we're not blogging about Cleveland today. We're talking about a new Columbus city map, which has some people in one neighborhood annoyed. And no, it's not because Bibb City is highlighted as if it's still a separate town....

Between Columbus International Metro Airport and Weems Road is a small body of water called Lake Heath. There's a narrow park on either side of the lake called Heath Park - and it would only make sense if a small concession stand opened in the park, selling Heath candy bars.

(So we're clear: this is NOT the small lake you see on the south side of Weems Road, between Whittlesey Boulevard and Blanchard Elementary School. That lake sometimes looks so brown, I wonder if Columbus Foundry employees visit it after work.)

But it turns out the land around Lake Heath now is considered a floodplain, based on assessments by the Federal Emergency Management Agency -- assessments which some residents around the lake consider a mistake. For one thing, FEMA doesn't seem to have noticed we're in a drought....

Columbus city engineers told WRBL Wednesday FEMA used aerial maps and some outside figuring in September, and concluded the Lake Heath neighborhood is a floodplain. That means homeowners nearby face a choice: either buy flood insurance , or hope Governor Sonny Perdue claims the lake for Atlanta's water supply.

Some homeowners around Lake Heath decided to apply for flood insurance - and their bills now total more than $1,000. Imagine how much homeowners around Lake Oliver and Lake Harding must be paying. After all, those lakes actually are still almost full.

But there's one thing FEMA apparently missed in preparing its new floodplain map. There's a spillway for diverting excess water from Lake Heath, so flooding is very unlikely. The spillway must not be that visible from the air -- and no children have put wading pools there, to help point it out.

The city of Columbus now plans to spend about $30,000 to have a new map made, so the Lake Heath spillway is noted. That means the floodplain designation will become like so much water in Georgia this year -- and it'll evaporate.

Columbus has several other small lakes you might not know about. The lake at Flat Rock Park flows below Manchester Expressway, into another one called Anthony Lake. Why Councilor Wayne Anthony hasn't called news conferences there to talk about water conservation, I have no idea....

Not much other local news thrilled us Wednesday, but here's what did....

+ A freeze warning was issued for the Columbus area - and that meant the pilot light for my wall heater was fired up for another winter. There's a big difference between Atlanta and Columbus, when it comes to this. In Atlanta, the heater comes on when pro basketball season starts. In Columbus, you wait one more week.

+ Carmike Cinemas stock lost almost 20 percent of its value, closing at a 52-week low of $12.32. Did the managers really think "In the Valley of Elah" would make THAT much money?

+ A special report by WXTX "News at Ten" showed Popeye's on River Road has the lowest health inspection score in Columbus, at 77. This is what can happen when Popeye's stops using Olive Oyl....

+ Instant Message to WKCN "Kissin' 99.3": Do you really mean that? I mean, the TV commercial which says you only play music "made in America?" Does that mean Australia's Keith Urban is banned from your station?

THE BLOG OF AMERICA: We continue to fill the "joke gap" while the Writers' Guild is on strike. You may have seen the union march on the set of "Desperate Housewives," chanting: "We write the story-a/ For Eva Longoria." So?! Let's see them come up with a rhyme for "CSI:NY" star Melina Kanakaredes.

+ The new President of France toured Washington. President Bush gave Nicolas Sarkozy a tour of George Washington's Mount Vernon home -- and hopefully did NOT bring up the fact that a horse named George Washington was put to sleep two weeks ago, at the Breeder's Cup.

(NBC's Brian Williams claimed at a White House dinner, the divorcing French President "went stag." Stag?! You don't even hear deer hunters use a word like that anymore....)

+ President Bush announced he'd called Pakistani President Pervez Musharraf. Mr. Bush says he told the Asian leader, among other things: "You need to take off your uniform." Our President probably has said this before, you know - when he owned baseball's Texas Rangers.

(President Bush explained the President of Pakistan cannot double as head of the armed forces. He learned that the hard way, of course - and also learned you can't even pass that military title over to Donald Rumsfeld.)

+ Pat Robertson of "The 700 Club" endorsed Republican Rudolph Giuliani for President. Somewhere on the campaign trail, minister and candidate Mike Huckabee flipped through his Bible to figure out what law he's breaking.

+ CBS News reported some "super-delegates" already have been chosen in the Democratic Presidential race. Hillary Rodham Clinton leads among them -- so Barack Obama may be a "rock star" candidate, but he's not a superstar.

+ The Federal Trade Commission fined Craftmatic beds more than four million dollars, for violating the "do not call" rules for telemarketers. Wow - Select Comfort's numbers don't even get above 100.

+ "Inside Edition" reported WellPoint executive David Colby has so many lovers scattered across the country, he may have 51 fiances. As a single guy, I only have one thing to say to this man. Ever heard of sharing?!?!

+ Tabloids from New York to London claimed Paul McCartney is in love with Nancy Striding, the estranged wife of a New York attorney. But why should we believe these newspapers? We'll do what McCartney suggested in a song long ago - and listen to what the man says.

+ Newly-released court papers in Los Angeles revealed Britney Spears has been ordered to pay Kevin Federline $120,000, to help with his legal bills. Well, at least he's legal. Sometimes we wonder about her....

+ TMZ reported Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie might be interested in buying Michael Jackson's Neverland ranch. In an odd way, this makes sense - since "Pax" sounds like a name which fits better on one of Jackson's monkeys.

+ The Country Music Association Awards were presented in Nashville. Kenny Chesney was named Entertainer of the Year. Sugarland ended Brooks and Dunn's long run as Vocal Duo of the Year. And was it just me, or did Miranda Lambert look like she'd shuffled her feet and touched 100 doorknobs?

The CMA Male Vocalist of the Year was Brad Paisley, while the Female Vocalist was Carrie Underwood. The female category surprised me a bit - because based on the Entertainer of the Year candidates at all the awards shows this year, I figured a couple of men would have been nominated.

(Did you hear one of the winning writers of the CMA Song of the Year, "Give It Away"? He thanked his ex-wife, for being a great mother to his children! It sounds like he's preparing a song for Kenny Chesney to sing at next year's awards show.)

+ There was sad news before the CMA's (which the telecast sadly never mentioned), as country singer Hank Thompson died at 82. I still have a vinyl LP of Thompson tunes, passed down through my family - but it's a bit strange, as it includes Thompson singing the "Beer Barrel Polka." Big and Rich probably would drink beer from a barrel, but they'd stop there.

+ The latest Nielsen ratings showed eight of the top 15 programs on cable television last week were episodes of "SpongeBob SquarePants." So when does Bill O'Reilly plan to declare him a danger to national security?

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