8 SEP 05: FAIR TO PARTLY CLOUDY
When is a fair not a fair, then a fair again? When it's at South Commons. The "Greater Columbus Fair" is returning in three weeks - after being called "The Festival at South Commons" for two years. Even the Columbus Wardogs lasted longer there than that name....
Columbus Civic Center manager Dale Hester explained Wednesday so many people kept calling it a fair, the old name was brought back to avoid confusion. So far, Fort Benning hasn't applied this logic to the School of the Americas.
The Columbus Civic Center is trying to make this year's fair spiffier than ever. For one thing, the schedule includes a rodeo. Any steer ridden for eight seconds becomes a candidate for the Exchange Club's foot-long hot dog trailer.
The Columbus International Festival has been moved from early August to October 1, so it also occurs during the fair. Dale Hester says this will prove it's truly a "Greater Columbus Fair." Instead of - well, what? The Teens and Rednecks Fair?
(Hey, wait a minute! Shouldn't the International Festival change ITS name as well? It would be -- well, you know -- only Fair.)
There's one potential disappointment in moving the date of the International Festival. You'll apparently have to buy a fair ticket, to attend an event that's always been free in the past. But then again, those Polynesian guys who throw around fire sticks need to pay for life insurance.
The Columbus Civic Center did NOT place the postponed Montgomery Gentry concert inside the fair. Now if it was Randy Travis or Ronnie Milsap, things might be different....
Perhaps the biggest disappointment for fair fans is this: the length of this year's event has been cut from 11 to six days, beginning September 27. It looks like city budget cuts have struck the fair - but if they have a dunk tank with Columbus Councilors, that could make up for it.
(This should teach some of you negative voters. It turns out last year's one-cent sales tax proposal was a "fair tax," after all.)
How far do you think this cutting back of the Greater Columbus Fair will go? One shudders at the thought....
+ Of funnel cakes reduced to the size of an oilspout.
+ Of grand-prize stuffed dolls which are NOT big enough to fill the back seat of a car.
+ Of "thrill rides" consisting of cardboard boxes sliding down the hill to the Riverwalk.
CLASSIC BLOG: This blog was first with word of the Greater Columbus Fair becoming a "festival" two years ago. This is from our entry of 29 Jul 03:
But to our topic: a competing local blog claims we are now at the start of "fair season." Maybe in some places, but not Columbus. We confirmed Monday the "Greater Columbus Fair" no longer exists! It's gone the way of that annual Ma Rainey blues festival -- which only lasted about one year.
Billboards for the Columbus Civic Center are promoting "The Festival at South Commons" in late September and early October. A spokeswoman for the Civic Center confirmed to me that's the new name of the Greater Columbus Fair. So for fair fans, the new rule apparently is B.Y.O.B. - Bring Your Own Blue-Ribbon.
Why drop the "fair" name for The Festival at South Commons? The Civic Center spokeswoman explained it several ways. For one thing: "It's not a fairground." So? When was the last time the Springer Opera House actually had an opera?
The woman also explained there's no "horticulture or agriculture" at the South Commons event, which would make it a fair. Apparently that petting zoo the last couple of years wasn't as popular as I thought.
(No horticulture at the Fair? All they'd have to do is invite florists to bring a few displays....)
C'mon now -- who says you have to have agriculture to hold a fair? Those farm animals in auction barns simply make things smell funny....
The Festival at South Commons is a matter of "rebranding" the fair for changing times, the Civic Center spokeswoman told me. Well, at least this new name is understandable. I wonder how many visitors stop and scratch their heads when they see a "TSYS."
E-MAIL UPDATE: In the wake of Wednesday's comment about local law officers serving in the hurricane damage zone, your blog learns the President of the Columbus Fraternal Order of Police is on the scene:
Richard,
My husband, Randy Robertson, is one of the sheriff deputies that went to assist with the search and rescue efforts from Hurricane Katrina. He left early Saturday morning, and hopefully will be home within a week, when another group of deputies from Columbus go to relieve the group he is with. Several Columbus Firefighters were also sent with these deputies. I have talked to Randy once, and he said that all of their group is doing fine, and they've gotten a lot accomplished in the short time they have been there. Please pray for these deputies and firefighters to remain safe and have a safe return home. Thanks.
Christy
I'm sure many will join in doing that, Christy. And remember, Columbus drivers - when you see those billboards asking why police officers are leaving, sometimes it's actually a good and noble thing.
Another familiar Columbus name has had anxious days, in the wake of the hurricane. The younger brother of WRBL's Blaine Stewart was missing, but he and his family now have been found, safe and sound. They fled to a little town along the Louisiana-Mississippi line -- where they may have lacked phone service, even before the storm.
Did you hear what Shaw High School students did for hurricane survivors? They held an in-school "telethon" Wednesday, and raised more than $6,000. When I was in high school, all you needed for special attention on the P-A system was a five-dollar bill.
(The Shaw High School telethon even featured a tote board. But sad to say, I didn't see any students putting on Chris Sweigart's giant pink hat.)
Meanwhile, Tropical Storm Ophelia is spinning off Florida's east coast. Forecasters warn it could become a hurricane this weekend - so c'mon, Governor Perdue! Send all the fire trucks to Brunswick now, like some expect you to do. That way, they'll get blown over with everything else.
Now for final thoughts from a wonderful Wednesday:
+ Georgia state officials unveiled their "Gas Gouger" web site, to report excessive prices at the pump. But it leads you to a form that YOU have to print out, fill out, then fax to Atlanta! Who suggested this approach, Georgia-Pacific paper?
+ The Georgia Public Service Commission began public hearings in Columbus, on a proposed natural gas rate increase. I think you can safely say the company asking for this is developing an "Atmos-Fear."
+ The late local news showed home video of a young man being forcefully arrested in Lanett, after a "Christian heavy metal" concert. So what's the problem with this? Police brought THEIR heavy metal - called handcuffs.
+ Phenix City officials dedicated a new section of their Riverwalk, stretching from 13th to 14th Street. As someone who's jogged on that new section throughout the summer, I can tell you this city has a BIG problem with response times.
COMING FRIDAY: The man selling fine china door-to-door.... at midnight....
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