27 NOV 06: LOVE CONNECTION

"Film is cheap. Opportunity is expensive." This deep statement was made to me, at a wedding I attended over the weekend. You expect profound comments to come from a pastor -- only this one came from the wedding photographer.

While I was NOT invited to Judge Bobby Peters's wedding somewhere in the Caribbean, I was invited to one at Wynnbrook Baptist Church near River Road. The church gained fame in the recent mayoral election, as the polling place of both Bob Poydasheff and Jim Wetherington. But I didn't spot a leftover Christian Coalition "voter guide" in the lobby.

Saturday night's wedding was a first for me, and I never knew it until the middle of the ceremony. The officiating pastor said Ron Luker and new wife Shirley Sullivan met on the Internet in June 2005. Considering the bride has grandchildren, this was even more amazing - as yes, older people DO know how to go online.

I asked one of the bride's daughters if Ron and Shirley had used one of those Internet dating services. She didn't think so, guessing the couple met in some sort of chat room. And here I thought "LOL" meant laugh out loud - not loving online.

The way Ron and Shirley met was interesting to me, because my pastor at church said during a summer sermon God doesn't use dating web sites such as eHarmony.com to bring couples together [6 Aug]. If they simply met in a chat room, I suppose that would be different -- and you know, I'm long overdue to play online card games.

(I mentioned the pastor's eHarmony comment at a table of single people during a recent church convention - and was amazed by how quickly the woman next to me changed the topic. She was more interested in the man to her right, anyway....)

About 40 to 50 people attended Ron and Shirley's wedding in the Wynnbrook Baptist Church worship center. The group didn't come close to filling all the pews. That's the peril of scheduling your ceremony on the evening of the Georgia-Georgia Tech football game.

The ceremony itself was small, as there was no long line of wedding attendants. The groom's brother was best man, and the bride's sister was the maid/matron of honor. No, the wedding cake was NOT something thawed out from the Publix freezer....

The ceremony was so small that no one stood when the bride walked down the aisle. I had no program to know when she was coming, but the families didn't stand to offer any clues. Maybe they didn't want to block the views of photographers.

The short ceremony had a rather humorous moment -- as the couple snuck a kiss to each other after exchanging rings, before a woman sang "The Lord's Prayer." The pastor never told the groom he could kiss the bride. But then again, we WERE at a Baptist church....

A nice sit-down reception followed in what appeared to be the Wynnbrook Baptist School lunchroom. That's where I met the official photographer - and I couldn't resist asking him: "If you're the paparazzi, where's your helicopter?"

The photographer happened to have three different cameras for the ceremony - two old-fashioned kinds which looked like 35-millimeter, and a smaller digital. He had enough film and room to shoot everyone at the reception twice, to prove we all were there.

The evening ended with everyone blowing bubbles at the bride and groom. If you didn't know, bubbles have become the new birdseed at weddings. We did this when one of my nieces became married four years ago - but this weekend, I felt far more interested in taking a tub bath when I got home.

Our best wishes to Ron and Shirley, as they begin married life together. But don't you wonder a little if they'll have separate computers?

After a Thanksgiving weekend dominated by wedding news, we have other things to discuss:

+ The Ledger-Enquirer reported the Columbus Police "vice squad" was reorganized a few months ago, after an officer filed a harassment complaint. It's now called the "Special Operations Unit" - a name which probably needed the approval of Fort Benning generals.

+ Columbus Police reported a customer was robbed inside the Wynnton Road Burger King - not the restaurant, but a customer. Maybe the robber was afraid if he went to the counter, he might see that mascot with the giant king head.

+ The evening news reported two Phenix City girls will appear in the 2007 "Hottest Hots" calendar. They'd better not sell that calendar around Club Roc, because they might wind up under arrest.

+ Weekend performances of "The Nutcracker" ballet concluded at the RiverCenter. Hopefully this production had a proper Columbus look - with toy soldiers dressed like the Third Brigade.

+ WRBL presented a special report on youth league baseball pitching. A St. Francis Hospital specialist claimed you can be "a good Little League pitcher and a good high school pitcher, but you probably can't be both." Someone should give him the phone number of Bryan Woodall, from Phenix City's 1999 Little League World Series. It's Plainsman Park, at Auburn University....

+ The Atlanta Falcons lost their fourth game in a row, 31-13 to New Orleans. A Columbus man's name was drawn on the Falcons radio broadcast to win free airline tickets, if the team made a touchdown of 50 yards or longer. But Michael Vick's long run seemed to fall short by (ahem) the length of his middle finger....

(Michael Vick apparently showed that finger to upset Georgia Dome fans, after the loss to New Orleans. This is absolutely the wrong way to remind people that you were once the number-one draft pick.)

+ Instant Message to the NCAA office: I have this great idea for college basketball. Have a "title belt," like boxing. When the defending national champion loses its first game, the team which beats them takes over the title. That way, my old school Kansas would be the champions right now -- and have something shiny to prove it.

COMING TUESDAY: We reveal plans for a new Columbus landmark....

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