20 MAR 08: LOCK 'EM UP AND THROW AWAY THE TRUTH

A realization came to me Wednesday night. Some things in life are reliable, such as today's first day of spring. Other things are notoriously unreliable, such as a Karmann-Ghia I drove in the 1980's. And few things are as unreliable as a rumor going through a public school -- whether by students or teachers.

Wednesday's news showed how unreliable those rumors can be. Two different Phenix City schools were put under lockdown - one based on inaccurate information, the other based on a rumor which couldn't be proven. It seems to show why Phenix City schools are better known for football stars than journalists.

It all started with a robbery at a Phenix City business (sorry, I don't know which one). Superintendent Larry DiChiara says the closest law officer to the scene of the holdup was a "resource officer" for South Girard School. A resource officer?! Is that what they call a library guard these days?

The South Girard School officer went after the robbers - and somehow word spread that the school was on lockdown. That word was NOT true, but the Westview Elementary principal apparently believed it and went into a lockdown on her own. When in doubt, don't let anybody out....

It's not clear if the robbers ever were found, but the Westview lockdown eventually ended. This was one time when the faculty probably also took a north, east and south view first.

Later in the day, Phenix City Central High School was placed under lockdown. At first it seemed to be related to Westview, but it turned out to be a completely different concern - rumors of a pistol on the school grounds. How ARE they starting the races at track meets now, anyway?

Superintendent Larry DiChiara says a one-hour search was conducted at Central High School - but NO gun was found anywhere. Maybe someone misunderstood a comment from a student, about a locker being a "pest-hole."

Yet here's the thing: a Phenix City parent told me later the Superintendent was the one spreading false information. I'm assuming this mother voted against the school sales tax, too....

This mother claimed "pot and a gun" WERE found in the high school sweep. She based this claim on words from an anonymous Central High senior. I should have asked if the senior was "anonymous," because he/she was the one with the marijuana.

Yet wasn't there another lockdown at Phenix City Central a few months ago? Why yes, there was - and I heard rumors that day about someone being chased in the halls with a weapon. It turned out to be a construction worker hitting a power line, and knocking out the electricity. But then again, maybe his supervisor got angry and grabbed a hammer....

It would have helped if the Phenix City Board of Education had posted something online for parents to check. But when we called up the district's web site Wednesday night, the lockdowns were nowhere to be found. Why not post the truth quickly, to stop the rumormongers? Or at least limit the rumors to winning tickets in Indonesian lotteries?

E-MAIL UPDATE: Now to Muscogee County schools....

I thought the discipline for the child in middle school who showed up with green strands in her hair on St.Paddy's day was a little harsh...I believe in a dress code. I believe in discipline,but putting the child in ISS didn't fit the crime..

If you're not aware, ISS stands for "in-school suspension" - it is NOT a division of the federal Department of Homeland Security.

But if we allow green-tinted hair for Saint Patrick's Day, where does this trend stop? Red hair for Valentine's Day? Green and red for Xmas? Blue hair at sports events, such as - no wait. Columbus High School students have done that for years.

Back to Phenix City now, for a question from Wednesday's topic:

I keep hearing that Phenix City will move the people from the riverfront land area,,, where too.??

I'm not absolutely sure about this. But I thought I heard something about new low-income housing being built near Ladonia. The Waffle House and Fred's store already are built on U.S. 80, waiting for them.

Now a quick check of other Wednesday news -- or at least the things worth joking about:

+ NeighborWorks Columbus announced a new program to help public safety employees buy their first homes. For every dollar employees save in an account, NeighborWorks will contribute three. I hereby invite the NeighborWorks staff to play poker with me sometime....

+ More than 700 Columbus-area children received new pairs of shoes, in an annual giveaway by the "Controllers Civic and Social Club." With a name like Controllers, it's a wonder no one's reported this group to Dr. Phil for intervention.

+ An Atlanta blog reported a Georgia state lawmaker wore a hidden microphone for a year, as part of a federal corruption investigation. OK, so what Buckhead nightclubs did everybody visit?

+ Instant Message to GPB Television: Yeow - a "My Music" fund-raiser for the third night in a row?! Why don't you take the children's programs off the air, and become an oldies version of MTV?

SCHEDULED FRIDAY: An e-mail challenges us to do some fact-checking.... on another e-mailer....

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BURKARD BULK MAIL INDEX: 729 (+ 30, 4.3%)

TRUDGE REPORT, DAY 18: 2.65 miles jogged, 0.5 walked. Total: 55.70 miles run, 8.85 walked

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