6 OCT 05: STEAMED CLEANERS

Wednesday was "Walk to School Day" in parts of Muscogee County. Maybe organizers forgot something, though -- Walk FROM School Day. At the end of the day, one Columbus woman openly wished students would walk as far away from her as possible -- and she was NOT a teacher.

BLOG EXCLUSIVE: Why is a woman on South Lumpkin Road threatening to call 911 and have grade school children arrested? Because the youngsters are hanging around her business after school - and perhaps more important, she doesn't have any candy or chips to sell them.

We saw this woman erupt Wednesday afternoon outside Oakland Park Cleaners, where she's apparently the manager. She threatened to call police on children who had just left South Columbus Elementary School. The strange thing was, none of those students were begging anyone for money.

Talk of boys beating someone up seemed to prompt the manager to come outside Oakland Park Cleaners Wednesday. "I'm going to call 911 on you," she warned, "and I'll report you to the principal."

To which one child noted later: "But we're outside school."

There's a laundromat attached to Oakland Park Cleaners, and at one point a woman doing laundry walked outside to offer the manager moral support. But almost all the grade schoolers had been chased away -- like church members running from the nightclub when the pastor drives by.

The root of the problem actually may not be with South Columbus Elementary's students. They cross a metal bridge above South Lumpkin Road to reach the Oakland Park Shopping Center, and several parents park there to pick them up. They avoid long lines of cars -- but they add lines to the cleaners' manager's brow.

"They're not supposed to park here," the manager noted during her Wednesday vent. The parents are supposed to line up outside the entrances to South Columbus Elementary School to get their children. But these parents are on the other side of the Fort Benning gate for a reason....

I've seen parents show up outside Oakland Park Cleaners as early as 2:15 p.m. to pick up their children. Many of them do NOT like to follow the marked lines in the parking lot. But then again, they're only following the teachers -- who seemed to give up five-row classrooms for "pods" years ago.

(It should be noted South Columbus Elementary is across the street from Our Lady of Lourdes Catholic school. But the school with a mass probably isn't responsible for a mass of traffic....)

If long lines of cars and large numbers of students are a problem at South Columbus Elementary School, I really don't think calling police to arrest children is the answer. For instance, the Oakland Park Cleaners manager could teach them valuable skills - such as sewing on army patches.

Nearby tenants at the Oakland Park Shopping Center also could come to the manager's rescue:

+ The shopping center has at least TWO churches, but neither are open for children after school. "Separation of church and state" wouldn't be an issue - since a four-lane road divides the school and the churches.

+ The center has Brito's Market and Millie's Corner - perfect places to teach the youngsters Spanish.

+ It also has a martial arts studio, which recently came under new ownership. If you want to beat somebody up after school, you might as well do it under official rules.

BLOG UPDATE: Muscogee County Sheriff Ralph Johnson joined the chorus of officers demanding a bigger staff Wednesday, after a convicted killer and two other men escaped from the county jail for awhile. They all apparently were escorted by one deputy - and any basketball fan can tell you a three-on-one fast break is trouble.

Did I hear it right - Sheriff Ralph Johnson is asking the U.S. Justice Department for money to hire additional staff members? That department doesn't even seem to have money to figure out if former deputy David Glisson was right or wrong....

The Muscogee County Jail escape could have been a lot worse. Authorities say one escapee stole a car from a nearby day care center -- but he couldn't figure out how to drive it, because it had a stick shift. These high-rolling criminals would look SO small without automatic transmissions in their sports cars.

While no one seemed willing to mention it, the jail escape sounded eerily like what happened in Atlanta last March. But apparently the escort deputy was unarmed, because nothing was said about a weapon being stolen. Is this what police officers do when they're on administrative leave?

As it happened, a Columbus Police officer shot another suspect during the same time as Wednesday's jail break. Police Chief Rick (Y or Y not?) Boren told reporters criminals are a lot more violent these days. This is what happens when they water down episodes of The Jerry Springer Show.

Hoping everyone will calm down (since it's the NEW moon, not the full one), here's what else we noticed Wednesday:

+ Which local TV journalist is admitting he/she had to bail out of a live appearance 15 seconds before air time, because he/she started throwing up? Wasn't there time to find the medical reporter, to provide live "breaking news"coverage of
this?

+ WRBL brought live lottery drawings back to Columbus for the first time in nearly two years. I'm not sure what led to this change. Is the station staff pooling money to buy tickets, and improve the company profits?

+ A Georgia state bus stopped in Cusseta, to provide people with free identification cards so they can vote. Leading "Voter ID Law" critic Jimmy Carter doesn't seem to know about this program. But then, he's been arguing against the law in Washington - not rural Georgia.

+ Atlanta lost its opening game of the baseball playoffs 10-5 to Houston. The game became such a blowout that "Francoeur's Franks" in the stands made like scrambled dogs -- and scrambled for the parking lot early.

+ Instant Message to the man who called WRCG's "TalkLine" and claimed a $200 membership in the CORTA tennis organization is "inexpensive": Is that why CORTA tournaments are played at Cooper Creek Park -- and not at Benning Park, near Baker Village?

COMING FRIDAY: The most unusual wedding invitation I've ever received....

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