22 APR 05: VICTORY-LAND
With all due respect to that gambling joint in Macon County, today I'm declaring Columbus "Victoryland." We have several victories to report about. In fact, about the only people who might feel like losers today are the local civil rights leaders....
For starters, there's the big basketball game this weekend. If the Riverdragons gain victory over Asheville Saturday night, they win the N.B.D.L. title. If they don't - well, I hope they don't follow the example of that other orange-wearing basketball team, Illinois.
The Asheville Altitude is (are?!) the defending N.B.D.L. champion, and brings a couple of players from last year's team to Columbus for this year's finals. So they have some experience in big games - which I guess you could call long-itude.
Instant Message to countless Columbus businesses: Where are your "Go Riverdragons" signs? Several places which cheered on the Cottonmouths three weeks ago don't seem to be doing the same for the basketball team. What's the matter - don't these players get into enough fistfights?
(And before you Bible Belt righteous folks bring up the Dragons nickname - why haven't you worked to get Columbus High and Phenix City Central to drop their "Devils?")
It's tempting to call Columbus "Titletown" these days. Columbus High School won a state baseball title last June. Russell County's team is ranked tops in the country this spring. The Cottonmouths won a league hockey title - and now the Riverdragons could follow them. I'm not missing those Wardogs one bit....
If you're looking for more victories, there's the "Best Ranger" competition beginning today at Fort Benning. Army Rangers will compete in a 60-hour test of endurance - and if terrorists have any brains at all, they won't set foot on post after hour 12.
Fort Benning has seven soldiers entered in the Best Ranger competition. They'll run and climb, shoot and jump - and probably feel like they're in basic training all over again....
But for me, the biggest victory of all occurred Thursday afternoon. I finished five weeks of serious spring cleaning at my home. In this age of adult attention deficit disorder, anything which takes five weeks should show how serious it is.
I focused on one room at a time over five weeks, clearing away the stains and dust while getting things as organized as possible. You'll be thrilled to know all my America Online free trial discs are now in a single stack.
When spring cleaning comes at my home, literally nothing goes untouched. Dust and bread crumbs could be hiding behind the bathroom stool. I'm more likely to find dead roaches there, but it could be....
One major victory in this year's spring cleaning involved a couple of large uninflated water bed mattresses. They sat lifelessly on the computer room floor ever since I moved to Columbus. Now they're out of sight under a cabinet in that room - just waiting for water beds to come back in style, in about ten years.
The computer room also had a large stack of unsorted papers on the floor, collected at all sorts of places over the years. I had time this spring to sort out everything in that stack, and get almost all of it off the floor! Well, the file folders are on the floor now - but I'm getting to those....
The stacks of papers include a religious publication called "Earth's Final Warning," with a picture of the late Pope John Paul II on the cover. It called him one of three remaining players fighting "to influence and to even control the future of mankind." The fact that "Sin City" was the top movie on the weekend of his death tells me he lost.
Spring cleaning always seems to bring some surprising discoveries. This year, the pile on a living room chair hid a bag from a diabetes event - with a six-pack of lemon cream cookies inside. I guess the cookies sat there for months. And I can verify the preservatives in them worked exceptionally well.
Yes, I know this is Earth Day - and I try to recycle during spring cleaning as much as I can. That meant a couple of trips to All-American Recycling along Martin Luther King Drive, to drop off white paper and cardboard. There's a fierce dog leashed at the entrance, so perhaps it helps in the processing....
The last area to be cleaned was the kitchen, concluding Thursday afternoon with the inside of the refrigerator. Have you ever seen a flat, shriveled-up apple - other than an old McIntosh monitor?
It's always satisfying to take the last bag of trash to the curb, and the last bits of newspapers and plastic to the recycling bins. It's even more satisfying to know Phenix City still hasn't installed security cameras at its recycling center, to catch my Georgia license plate.
BLOG UPDATE: Now to Thursday's biggest victory in the area, for the Historic Columbus Foundation. Civil rights leaders called off their planned boycott and picket of Riverfest. Once again, the old folks taught those young whipper-snappers a thing or two....
Civil rights leaders claimed a Riverfest picket would be "minuscule," compared to the national strategy they're now planning in the Kenneth Walker case. We don't know yet what that strategy is - but it certainly would be minuscule compared to the crowds walking by them.
Interdenominational Ministerial Alliance leader Wayne Baker told reporters: "Riverfest is just a drop in the bucket.... it is not the main thing." Now hold on here! The NAACP's Bill Madison called Riverfest "the next big event" in Columbus [5 Apr] - and now it's just a drop in the bucket? Some strips of bacon don't shrink so much that quickly.
Attorney Joseph Wiley told WRBL he suggested civil rights leaders call off the Riverfest picket, to "avoid an ugly situation for our community." After all, if Vietnam veterans are spitting on Jane Fonda during her book tour....
(But wouldn't the "ugliness" work in the civil rights groups' favor? Fans of Sugarland and Smashmouth are far more likely than the picketers to resort to name-calling -- especially after dark, and after a couple of beers.)
Joseph Wiley says he's "aware of the energy" among civil rights groups after Wednesday's ruling in the Kenneth Walker case. But he says a "cooling-off" period is needed. Who could have guessed this African-American attorney would move to the other side of the tracks - the tracks on Ninth Street, to the Government Center side?
Civil rights groups backed down on much more than a Riverfest boycott. Next week's "days of abstinence" were canceled, along with the April 30 march which Bill Madison predicted would draw 30,000 people. These leaders fold up so well, they should work for Continental Cleaners.
(If you want a "national strategy" in the Kenneth Walker case, why cancel a march which you claim will bring 30,000 people together in Columbus? Were all the hotel rooms booked, so nationally-known leaders couldn't stay there?)
So many events were planned to keep Kenneth Walker's name in the spotlight - and now they're all gone?! This should show once and for all why civil rights groups need female leaders. All these guys simply can't commit to anything.
As we suggested with Wednesday's court hearing on the Kenneth Walker case, Columbus civil rights leaders again backed down at the brink of a big showdown. If I ever set up a "Columbus Hold 'Em Poker Championship," I know the perfect people to invite to my table....
But civil rights groups aren't giving up the fight against Kenneth Walker's killer completely. They want the Georgia Supreme Court to review whether David Glisson should have been required to testify under oath to a grand jury. And I still would like someone to ask Glisson to take off his sunglasses for a picture.
Antonio Carter of the National Action Network said of the Wednesday ruling denying a second grand jury in the Kenneth Walker case: "It's bad to be defeated, but even worse to surrender." He should tell that to businesses in downtown Phenix City. Surrendering on the days of abstinence will cost them some extra money.
The cancellation of all the civil rights protests leaves several unanswered questions in my mind:
+ Why did the leaders really back down, instead of going all the way with their convictions? Do they quietly realize they lack local support? Or do the NAACP and Urban League need extra money, charging for Riverfest parking on First Avenue?
+ Do civil rights leaders set a bad example to African-American youth, by not following through on their promises? Doesn't this simply reinforce the stereotype that Democrats have no backbone?
+ If visits by Al Sharpton and Jesse Jackson haven't stirred national attention in the Kenneth Walker case, what sort of "national strategy" will? Does Walker's widow have to write a book, and get it mentioned by Oprah Winfrey?
+ Has Columbus found a dangerous new leader, who can challenge Mayor Bob Poydasheff for reelection? Or does Virginia Peebles of the Historic Columbus Foundation even want to run?
THE BIG BLOG QUESTION certainly settled where you stand on Riverfest. Over four days, an 82-percent majority told us you plan to go this weekend. So my church group's Saturday night dinner at Bludau's downtown just became a lot more complicated....
Only one voter out of 11 in our survey planned to stay away from Riverfest because of the promised boycott. But only one voter planned to attend BECAUSE of the boycott -- so these civil rights leaders need to think twice about going on a regional speaking tour.
One loyal blog reader posted 14 questions about possible Riverfest pickets. I didn't have time Thursday to track down answers -- but I can guess at a few of them:
+ Would minors be allowed to picket? If they're allowed to have a Riverfest Youth Art Show, it simply would be a different form of self-expression.
+ Would picketers be allowed food and drink? Shame on you - checking to see if African-American protesters brought bananas.
+ Would picketers be put through metal detectors? If they're outside the official Riverfest area, why would they be? It's not like a Republican or Democratic convention, where we're trying at all costs to protect politicians.
The questioner also asked if local law enforcement was ready to protect Riverfest. That answer is yes - as the Historic Columbus Foundation is hiring 30 off-duty Columbus police officers, and will have pairs of officers at every entrance. If bean bags aren't needed for guns, they could be used to stuff chairs.
With spring cleaning finished, I was able to walk down Broadway Thursday evening during the Riverfest tour of homes. I noticed a small number of people out strolling, as well as a well-marked Char-Broil trailer in the middle of Broadway. What do you know, there could be something there to protest after all - job outsourcing.
SONG OF THE DAY: We thank Columbus civil rights leaders for inspiring new words to the classic tune "Camptown Races:"
Riverfest's no longer sin - doo dah, doo dah!
Rainbow/PUSH says go on in - oh-de-doo-dah-day!
You can roast a pig!
You can watch a show!
Don't think about a killer cop -
It's now OK to go!
Now final thoughts from a day of various victories:
+ A missing Shaw High School cheerleader was found unharmed. It turned out she left home earlier in the week, to protest the loss of her cell phone privileges. Doesn't any neighbor on her block have a traditional land-line phone for calls?
+ Rick Ussery announced he'll retire as an executive with TSYS June 30. Instead of a gold watch, I suppose he'll be given a platinum card with a $100,000 line of credit.
+ The NCAA women's gymnastics championships began at Auburn University. If that old movie title was true and "white men can't jump," how do these women do it so well?
+ Columbus State University signed five men's basketball players for next season. One of them is a transfer from an Illinois community college named Justin Wilson. If he wants to avoid a lot of trouble in this part of the country, he'd better learn Cajun cooking recipes this summer....
(BLOGGER'S NOTE: Because we're keeping New Testament Passover weekend, our next scheduled post will be on Monday.)
Your PayPal donations can keep this blog ad-free and independent-minded. To make a donation, offer a story tip or comment on this blog, write me - but be warned, I may post a reply.
If you quote from this in public somewhere, please be polite enough to let me know.
© 2003-05 Richard Burkard, All Rights Reserved.