Wednesday, June 09, 2004

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9 JUN 04: I'VE GOT A NAME



After weeks of painting and fixing at my apartment complex, I came home Tuesday evening to the biggest surprise of all. The complex now has a NAME on a sign in the courtyard outside! It's about the only new sign on First Avenue that doesn't
say "Bobby Peters" on it.



For seven years I was never sure exactly what the name of the apartment complex was. The only sign outside was one for the realty company/landlord. And if that's not there anymore, should I start worrying about a new owner jacking up my rent?



So now I'm delighted to tell you I live in the "First Avenue Apartments." I'd tell you exactly which one - but the terrorists might change their target from the Sea Island summit to the other side of Georgia.



(I'm not sure how long that new apartment sign is going to last. A man in one apartment loves to shoot B-B's off his porch - and if he grows tired of the birdhouse in the courtyard, it's only a matter of time....)



That's not the only new thing outside my apartment complex. Two big "no parking" signs have gone up on walls facing First Avenue. This is a bit puzzling, since I've parked off the street along First Avenue all along. What are all the spaces for - people with wi-fi laptops?



It's not like there's a big demand for parking spaces at the First Avenue Apartments....


+ The sewer work in April chased any Riverwalk tourists away.



+ The Columbus Catfish on the other side of Fourth Street haven't sold out a home game all season.



+ A small Anglican church sits next door to the apartments - but those people don't double-park for blocks the way Fourth Street Baptist worshippers do.



But back to my home's new sign: have you noticed some of the curious names for apartment complexes around Columbus? There's one close to Cusseta Road and Brown Avenue with the sign: "CRAWFORD TERROR APTS." Not even September 11, 2001 changed it - so does the F.B.I. know about this place?



(How interesting that the "Crawford Terror Apartments" sit only a couple of blocks from the Boom Boom Room....)



And did I see this right in the phone book Tuesday night - there are "Bullet Apartments" on Bullet Boulevard? And what's even more amazing is that it's NOT public housing....



Sometimes the name of the apartment complex isn't the problem - it's the logo or shape of it. Take the Park View apartments on Armour Road. Yes, it's across from Britt David Park - but the name looks someone spray-painted it on for community service, after a graffiti violation.



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