^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

13 JUN 04: SAFETY JUMPERS

Twelve Columbus firefighters received promotions at a Friday ceremony. But the news reports left out one big detail - how many of the people they're replacing moved to Atlanta for a big raise.

The promotion ceremony was emotional for some of the firefighters. After all, they went through all sorts of preparation to take tests for higher ranks. If only more parents did this with third-graders, before the CRCT exams.

I'm not sure what sort of test you have to pass, to win promotion to Captain or Sergeant in the Columbus Fire Department. Perhaps you have to show dexterity in climbing - by going up a billboard, and posting a sign urging people to call their City Councilors.

(If you win something at the Georgia Police and Fire Games, do you improve your chances of getting a promotion? That seems to work for minor league ball players, after all....)

Meanwhile, Columbus Police officers returned home Saturday from security duty at the "Group of Eight" Summit on the Georgia coast. This crew did an excellent job - scaring away not only the terrorists, but thousands of Savannah and Brunswick-area tourists.

One report Saturday night said security personnel outnumbered protesters at the G-8 Summit by 20,000 to 300. These numbers also should explain why more big-name musicians have concerts in Atlanta instead of Columbus.

(If this ratio seems like overkill to you, keep one thing in mind - those numbers are reversed when it comes to the Alabama State Police watching speeders.)

Columbus and Americus police officers were paid $15 an hour to serve on security duty at the G-8 Summit. Considering how few protesters showed up, a good chunk of that money may have been spent on bottled water and sunscreen.

Speaking of security, another group of Fort Benning soldiers returned home Saturday from duty in Iraq. We hope absolutely none of them receive a "welcome-home" discount from the Boom Boom Room.

There are plenty of other scattered topics to discuss this weekend:

+ The Muscogee County Democrats opened their election-year headquarters - at the same Macon Road building Republicans used for a headquarters two years ago. Whoever owns this building obviously isn't registered to vote.

(This IS a step up for the Democrats. This building on Macon Road used to be a dry-cleaning shop. A few years ago, the Democrats used a converted package store downtown.)

+ The Muscogee County Democrat Executive Committee then announced it's endorsing a clean slate of school board candidates, and not one incumbent. What's going on here? I thought all the board members endorsed the sales tax increase.

+ WRBL reported former Senator Max Cleland has joined the list of rumored running mates for Democratic Presidential candidate John Kerry. If this is true, someone needs to remind the Kerry campaign about two years ago - when Cleland was trounced for re-election, then moved out of Georgia.

+ Superior Court Judge Roxann Daniel's campaign rolled out its first TV commercial. It includes big-name endorsements from Reps. Tom Buck and Carolyn Hugley - leaving me more convinced than ever that Bobby Peters quietly has turned Republican.

(So where is the endorsement from ISAIAH Hugley? After all, he's the Assistant City Manager - and has to share the same Government Center with the judge.)

+ Troy State University trustees approved a nine-percent tuition increase. Does it take THAT much money to repaint the signs, and take the "State" out?

+ Several local TV and radio stations carried the state funeral in Washington for Ronald Reagan. It took me awhile to figure out why "Sunny 100 FM" broadcast it - but then I realized he was President for most of the "Totally 80's Weekend."

+ WSHE-AM offered a Saturday night surprise, by broadcasting the Indy Racing League car race from Dallas-Fort Worth. This station usually broadcasts NASCAR races -- so did someone convince the managers this was Nextel Cup on steroids?

(Then again, maybe someone at Ritmo Latino Radio fouled up - because even with the drivers from Brazil, this IRL race was broadcast in English.)

+ Georgia's baseball team advanced to the College World Series, by sweeping Georgia Tech in the Atlanta "super-regionals." Turner Field was available for this series, yet went unused -- as the management apparently decided one losing home team is enough.

+ Instant Message to the customer who stood on a chair at an Applebee's restaurant Saturday, and appeared to be cleaning the air conditioning vent: Was that really necessary? I really don't think the soot from Continental Carbon travels all the way to University Avenue.

COMING MONDAY: Four little words, which have me concerned I'm starting to lose my hearing....

To offer a story tip, make a donation or comment on this blog, write me - but be warned, I may post a reply.

If you quote from this in public somewhere, please be polite enough to let me know.

© 2003-04 Richard Burkard, All Rights Reserved.