Monday, January 01, 2007

1 JAN 07: HAND OUT THE HARDWARE



Thank you, thank you all -- and welcome to the annual Burkard Awards, honoring the most noteworthy people, places and things of 2006! We do this now to beat the award show rush. And besides, you may still be wearing "party formals" as you read this.



Without any further adieu (and why do people never admit they add further adieu, anyway?), let's present the Burkard Award winners for this year!


+ Biggest news story of the year: The Northern Little League winning the World Series. But what did they do wrong? They're NOT on Tuesday's mayoral inauguration program.



+ Biggest political story of the year: Two longtime incumbents in Columbus city government being voted out of office. Maybe the "Big Eddy Club" has been replaced by the F.O.P. Club.



+ Biggest business story of the year: Road America's new call center. I'll believe there's a Kia plant in West Point when there's a grand opening, and the executives are not in prison.



+ Most shocking business development: The closing of not one, but two barbecue restaurants along U.S. 280 in Phenix City. All those new restaurants at Columbus Park Crossing must be disrupting people's taste buds.



+ Biggest business mystery: That Eufaula may approve a Wal-Mart SuperCenter faster than Columbus Council did for the store in Midland. I won't be surprised if Eufaula's store opens first.



+ Biggest overall mystery of the year: The name of the Revenue Department employee who wrote off landfill payments, and shredded documents detailing them. Could this person possibly be a member of the Big Eddy Club?



+ Biggest sports mystery of the year: How 8,000 or more fans could fill the Columbus Civic Center to welcome home the Little League champions at 6:00 p.m. on a stormy afternoon, but nowhere near that many show up for Columbus Catfish games at 7:00 p.m. when the weather's nice.



+ Politician most in denial: Don Siegelman. Honorable mention: Nathan Suber.



+ Politician most conspicuous by his silence: Dylan Glenn.



+ Candidate most likely to run for office in 2008 and win: Ronnie Reed for Russell County Commissioner.



+ Candidate most likely NOT to be reelected: Georgia Governor Sonny Perdue. We awarded him this last year, too - but now it's because of term limits.



+ Best prediction on our part from a year ago: The switch of WHAL-AM from gospel music to Spanish. I think I've finally figured out the difference between Paulina Rubio's voice and Shakira's.



+ Subject of the most frequent negative rumors: Muscogee County Schools Athletic Director Charles Flowers. He hasn't left his job. He doesn't have an official assistant. And he wasn't able to fix the baseball playoffs, so Shaw beat Columbus High.



+ Coach of the year: At the risk of being daring, we give this to Carver High School football coach Dell McGee. Few people really expected this "Dell upgrade" to work, yet it did.



+ Best potential sports trade: The Atlanta Falcons dealing Jim Mora Jr. to Alabama, for Mike Shula and a couple of draft choices.



+ Mismatch of the year: Russell County Sheriff Tommy Boswell asking for a 20 percent staff raise, while it was the Phenix City Council which voted for awhile to triple the mayor's salary.



+ Utility person of the year: WRBL's now-departed Blaine Stewart. He anchored the news, presented the weather for several weeks, had the title "Senior Producer" - and we may hear him for months to come, explaining the fine points of high-definition TV.



+ Beggar of the year: We met eight of them, and give the prize to the man in the parking lot of Winn-Dixie on South Lumpkin Road. He said twice, "I'm not a bad person" - then refused to let us see the car which needed gas, and said he could only accept money where he was standing.



+ Biggest disappointment of the year: WRCG dismissing Antonio Carter as co-host of "TalkLine." His rotating replacements would never mix in with the crowd at a civil rights rally.



+ Most disappointing sale (so far): The quitting-business sale at Parisian. A 20-percent discount off overpriced clothing is still too high.



+ Strangest controversy of the year: The debate in the Ledger-Enquirer over who killed Columbus Square Mall. Maybe the man who led the Princess Diana inquiry should come to town, and settle this.



+ Strangest irony of the year: That the "Lucky 7 Lounge" caught fire, and didn't make it to the start of 2007.



+ Biggest musical embarrassment: The Columbus Civic Center selling only a couple dozen tickets for its tenth anniversary concert. Maybe if the Northern Little League had been taught to sing....



+ Most interesting tour of homes: To see where Ed Harbison lives, in both Columbus and Atlanta.



+ Most distracting thing for Riverwalk joggers: The smell of cinnamon rolls and pies from the Dolly Madison bakery on Victory Drive.



+ Nicest surprise on radio: The new WURY-FM at 97.1. What other Christian radio station would dare play Elvis Presley songs?



+ Most overdue improvement on radio: WDAK adding more local news to each half-hour in the morning. But I still think Bruce Lee is a better meteorologist than Chris Weber.



+ Best new discovery on Columbus television: The Rivertown Ford infomercials. The staff's stardom has gone to their heads so much, they appeared in the Bi-City Christmas Parade.



+ Nicest distraction on Columbus television: Deborah Singer. Yes, I've told her (sort of). Yes, she's spoken for. Sigh.



+ Longest name on Columbus television: WRBL reporter Susan-Elizabeth Littlefield.



+ Best candidate for a TV reality series: The Russell County School District.



+ Funniest preacher: LaGrange's Aaron McCollough, whose "Fresh Fire" broadcast is on WSHE-AM on Sunday mornings. Sometimes he cracks so many one-liners that he forgets the topic of his sermon.



+ Best blog competition: the new "Fountain City Journal," written by Columbus political activist Colin Martin. He analyzes local politics. Now all he needs is a joke writer.



+ Nicest weather surprise: That I can write this blog on the night of December 31 in running shorts, without the heat on.



+ Nicest (other) thing about a rainy December 31: That your neighbor in the apartment complex can't shoot off his noisy "sparklers" just outside his porch.



+ Blog joke of the year: We defer to a co-worker, who offered this question in early December -- why didn't Columbus Councilor Nathan Suber put on a cape in his campaign commercials, and call himself "Suber-man?" It just might have worked.






This blog had more than 28,000 visits in 2006, from people in Columbus and around the world. To advertise to them, offer a story tip or comment on this blog, write me - but be warned, I may post your e-mail comment and offer a reply.



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