10 MAR 05: OH DANNY BOY

Wednesday night marked the end of an era in television news, as Dan Rather anchored his final broadcast for CBS. So why didn't any station tell us where Columbus Republicans gathered to celebrate?

WRBL marked Dan Rather's departure by talking with former news anchors who met him he took over the CBS Evening News in 1981. Al Fleming described Rather as a "friendly guy" who thought he could replace Walter Cronkite. Now Rather will have a second chance to do that - if PBS will let him host classical music concerts.

WRBL sent Al Fleming and Dick McMichael to New York in 1981 to do promotional pieces with Dan Rather. Fleming admits he asked Rather for an autograph. Given the conservative tone of Fleming's commentaries, it's a wonder he didn't burn that autograph in a fireplace years ago.

(I can't help noticing WRBL didn't send anyone to New York this week, as Bob Schieffer becomes CBS Evening News anchor. Maybe the managers fear the network will hire Blaine Stewart as the permanent replacement.)

Al Fleming says Dan Rather has had a "fantastic" career, and should still be a "tremendous" reporter on "60 Minutes Wednesday." There's a true TV anchor for you - when all else fails, blame the producer behind the scenes.

Dick McMichael recalled how he shared the same makeup chair as Dan Rather in 1981. Truly this was a different era. Nowadays some Southerners visiting New York might ask for a different chair, because they don't want to get HIV.

Dick McMichael noted he met Dan Rather before the 1981 promotional trip to New York. Rather traveled to West Point to do a story on a mill. Hey, what do you know -- the idea to wear sweaters at the anchor desk may have come from around here.

Dick McMichael realizes Dan Rather has had plenty of critics. But McMichael said part of the job of being a journalist is that many people don't like you. So why do so many beauty pageant winners turn into reporters?

The 1981 trip to New York marked a new era for WRBL, as well as CBS News. The station decided then to have newscasts at both 6:00 p.m. and 7:00 p.m. These days, WRBL still does - and who knows how much money they pay off WCGT, to air that 7:00 replay.

LAUGHLINE FLASHBACK: During the years when we wrote LaughLine for a national audience, Dan Rather came up often. Here's some of what we said about him:

3 Dec 99: By the way, have you noticed what Dan Rather calls the Texas Governor: "George W. Bush the YOUNGER." I don't recall him calling former President Bush the ELDER.

15 Sep 00: By the way, Dan Rather has taken pains the last two nights to say the Bush-Gore meetings are NOT debates. He called them Thursday "joint appearances, " "face-offs," and "modified news conference - talk show formats!" We'd like to challenge Rather to a debate about this - but first we want to know what we'd have to do.

13 Oct 00: You know things are serious in the Middle East when Dan Rather's heading there. He promises to report from Jerusalem tonight. Both Jews and Arabs should enjoy how Rather compares the emotions in the region to an unbroken wild horse on the Nevada range.

2 Nov 00: Dan Rather made a point of saying his interviews with the [Presidential] candidates were face-to-face, and "NOT electronic." Take that, Tom Brokaw - no, wait. How did CBS record the interviews? They certainly didn't use film.

8 Nov 00: We can't overlook Dan Rather, and his infamous Election Night one-liners. In case you missed some of them, he said:

+ The race was "jar lid tight." But when Florida was declared for Albert Gore, it was CBS in a pickle.

+ The contest was "tighter than rusted lugnuts on a '55 Ford." For you younger voters, think about a scooter that's been left out in the rain all day.

+ After losing Tennessee, the Gore campaign was "as cross as a snapping turtle." Let the record show that they may get angry - but none of them have any teeth.

9 Nov 00: Dan Rather stayed up all night covering the election - then made quite a statement on CBS at 10:30 a.m. He noted the candidates had their campaign managers make late-night announcements about Florida, and said: "I don't see real leadership qualities in either of them." We couldn't help wondering if Rather said this because he hadn't gone to the bathroom all night.

5 Jan 01: Dan Rather announced Thursday night that CBS News will change its rules for covering Presidential elections. For starters, Rather will be allowed to make comparisons to rodeo cowboys only twice an hour....

27 Mar 01: The "Drudge Report" claimed NBC's Tim Russert has been approached about replacing Dan Rather on the "CBS Evening News." Russert supposedly has "star quality." Are you sure it wasn't that slate board he was holding?

24 Apr 01: U.S. Secretary of State Colin Powell told the PBS "NewsHour" the use of CIA surveillance planes in Peru was NOT a "deep, dark secret." Yet Dan Rather on CBS called it a "top-secret CIA operation gone bad." So who's right here? Is something always "top-secret" if the reporter doesn't know about it?

14 May 01: The music world is in mourning, after the weekend death of Perry Como. He made cardigan sweaters popular on TV in the 1950's and 60's - only to see Dan Rather kill them off 20 years later.

28 Jun 01: We believe the proper way to pronounce the U.N. Secretary-General's name is "KOH-fee ANN-on." But we've heard Dan Rather from time to time call him "KOH-fee an-NON." Say it that way, and he sounds like a 12-step program for Starbucks junkies....

12 Jul 01: Have you noticed Dan Rather has not mentioned the Chandra Levy mystery even ONCE on the CBS Evening News? Maybe he's waiting for Steve Hartman of "Everybody has a Story" to throw his dart on the right part of the country.

13 Jul 01: The search for Chandra Levy continued in Washington Thursday - and again, Dan Rather decided to leave it out of the CBS Evening News. Apparently the network's initials now stand for [Gary] "Condit, Blameless of Sin."

19 Jul 01: Wednesday night brought a major break in a controversy that's divided the country for weeks. A man who's been silent about the Chandra Levy case finally spoke out on national television. Now the analysis begins - why did Dan Rather wait so long?

1 Aug 01: The commission on election reform also asks all TV networks NOT to report vote projections until all polls are closed from coast to coast. CBS already has a plan to get around this. Dan Rather will describe vote margins as "bigger than a Texas cattle ranch."

21 Aug 01: Many TV watchers thought CBS had the inside track to a Gary Condit interview, because Dan Rather hardly mentioned him during the evening newscast. But maybe that wound up hurting CBS. Rather might talk to the Congressman, decide he had no news value, and never put the tape on the air.

25 Oct 01: Back in New York, Dan Rather is being Mr. Tough against terrorism. Even though an anthrax-laden letter was sent to his CBS office, he keeps working there - and refuses to take medicine! Maybe he's waiting for the disease to develop, so he can host "48 Hours in I-C-U."

27 Dec 01: Some reporters raised doubts the new videotape shows Usama bin-Laden at all. Dan Rather of CBS used the phrase "appears to be...." and mentioned there were "previous alleged tapes." Huh?!?! Does Rather suspect the other messages were on D-V-D or something?

16 Jan 02: Dan Rather is back in Afghanistan this week. CBS's John Roberts introduced him Tuesday night by saying he was "looking for losers" of the fight against terrorism. Talk about a waste of time and money! Rather should check the evening news ratings - he's still losing there.

6 Mar 02: Dan Rather nearly broke down in tears Tuesday night, at the end of the "CBS Evening News." Rather choked up noticeably after reading biographies of seven "fallen heroes" who died in eastern Afghanistan. We're waiting to learn whether David Letterman was rushed to the newsroom to calm things down.

(First Dan Rather lost it on David Letterman's "Late Show," and now he's almost crying at the end of his own newscast. If he keeps this up, he'll get his own daytime talk show.)

Dan Rather devoted much of Tuesday's CBS newscast to the fighting in eastern Afghanistan. By comparison, NBC's Tom Brokaw mentioned the battle for only the first couple of minutes. OK, which news anchor do YOU think is shopping around a book deal on the fight against terrorism?

7 Mar 02: Dan Rather referred to the CBS Evening News on the air as "the hard news outfit...." -- one night after he almost broke down in tears at the end of the program. The news may be hard, but at least the newscaster's heart is a bit soft.

23 May 02: Dan Rather mentioned the discovery of Chandra Levy's body on the CBS Evening News. He called it, "One of the most publicized missing persons cases in recent years." Except on YOUR newscast, Mr. Rather -- where you ignored the story for weeks at a time....

24 Jul 02: Dan Rather returned to the anchor desk Tuesday night, and at one point declared: "You're getting your news from the fiercely independent, hard-news outfit, CBS." Wow....

A> How many steroids did the doctor give Rather on his day off?

B> Charles Osgood must have lined up some new radio sponsors to plug.

C> So much for doing any more polls with "The New York Times."

D> Does Rather say that to Julie Chen's face, on the day after she hosts "Big Brother?"

E> Calm down, Dan - Ted Koppel only appeared on David Letterman's show ONCE.

F> If "Everybody Has a Story" reporter Steve Hartman throws one more dart toward Rather's office, Rather may fire it back at him.

The strange thing is that only minutes after Dan Rather declared CBS the "hard-news outfit," he introduced a report on bald eagles in New York City. What's so "hard news" about this? Did the photographers hurt their necks, pointing a camera toward the sky?

2 Oct 02: People in Grand Isle, Louisiana will evacuate their homes today, because of Hurricane Lili. They'll do this as Dan Rather flies TO the Gulf coast, to report on the storm for CBS News. After all these years, it seems Rather still doesn't "know the frequency...."

SONG OF THE DAY: I dropped off my Georgia tax form at the post office Tuesday, after mailing the federal return a few days ago. This calls for a celebration, to the classic tune of "On Top Of Old Smoky":

I filed my taxes - they're now in the mail.

I sent them on time, so I won't go to jail.

The Georgia "500" will be in its place --

But how I wish it was just a car race.

Do I get a refund?

I'm not telling you!

You might stalk my mailbox

Like cats at the zoo!

COMING FRIDAY: An e-mail suggestion about being blue....

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