9 JAN 05: LEFT? RIGHT? LEFT?

The caller had watched the 6:00 p.m. news, and he was puzzled. "They showed someone on there with a United States flag on, and the stars were in the upper-right corner and the stripes were going to the left." He assumed something was wrong here - unless maybe he was driving, and watched the back-seat TV in his rear-view mirror.

"An upside-down flag is a distress signal," the caller pointed out the other night. "The stars should be in the upper-left corner." So what should I do at a ball game, if I'm looking at the flag from the opposite direction -- run around to the other side?

The man didn't know what to make of the "backward" flag he saw - and he wasn't quite sure what I should do about it, either. "I'm just reporting it," he said. I guess this is why blogs exist. We're more "All Things Considered" than that public radio show.

A quick check online didn't give me a good answer to the "right to left" flag question. But then on Friday, I came upon a couple of Fort Benning soldiers - and wouldn't you know, they had shoulder-patch flags pointing right to left! At least, I assumed these were soldiers. They could have been dishonorably discharged for those flags....

"Excuse me, sir," I asked one of the soldiers. "Someone asked me why your flag is pointing from right to left."

"We're at war," he answered. "The war on terrorism." I would have asked more, but I didn't. That man might have suspected me of trying to learn government secrets.

The question about the flag developed as Fort Benning soldiers began heading back to Iraq. Thousands of G.I.'s and relatives attended a big send-off ceremony Friday at Doughboy Stadium. So did Pillsbury join in, and give everyone biscuit coupons?

Columbus Mayor Bob Poydasheff told the soldiers if they need anything, his number is listed in the phone book. Hopefully he won't mind if the Third Brigade calls him COLLECT from Iraq.

(Uh-oh - has Mayor Poydasheff made that same offer to Columbus police officers?)

Political figures of all kinds attended the Fort Benning sendoff ceremony. Republicans like Governor Sonny Perdue and Mayor Bob Poydasheff were there. So was Democrat Rep. Sanford Bishop. And from the scheduling, it appears Fort Benning didn't expect anyone involved with the NAACP banquet to show up.

Some Fort Benning soldiers received good news Saturday. A settlement was announced with American Amicable Life Insurance Company, requiring it to pay soldiers $1.3 million for misleading them about high-priced policies. The company reportedly called it an "investment plan" - and I suppose the company WILL keep the interest on that money....

Now for other weekend items - and if you haven't checked the 8 January item, please do so to understand why this entry is shortened a bit:

+ The Ledger-Enquirer reported a temporary restraining order was filed against former Marshal Ken Suddeth, for the return of both badges and weapons. Mr. Suddeth said last year he was "answerable only to the voters" - but it appears he lost his hearing around November 2.

+ A new seasonal business opened on South Lumpkin Road called "Sharks and Saints Tax Service." C'mon now - would YOU want to get your taxes prepared at a place with this name? You have a 50-50 chance of getting in big trouble.

+ The Royal Lipizzaner Stallions performed at the Columbus Civic Center. Hopefully no one in the crowd placed bets on which horse would go around the ring fastest.

+ The Atlanta Journal-Constitution web site unveiled its own special page for news about Michael Vick. The Falcons quarterback now has something not given to Governor Perdue, Neal Boortz, any "Dirty South" rap star -- and this truly shows how far Ted Turner has fallen.

+ Instant Message to WEAM Radio: Can we make a deal? I'll send you my Friday afternoon running schedule. You play "Oh Happy Day" at that time. And like this past Friday, you'll keep inspiring me to run farther -- even if people around me wonder why I'm clapping my hands and singing.

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