31 JAN 05: AROUND AND OUT
When mail reaches you with a red star on it, it tends to get your attention. One such letter reached my box on Friday, and I opened it. Who knows how many people thought it was an invitation from the Communist Party, and threw it away.
I opened the letter, and it confirmed the end of a transition noted here several months ago. Macy's officially has replaced Rich's at Peachtree Mall. I guess this gives the mall a "New York" feel to it - so I guess before long, you'll be able to buy bags of bagel chips at the cash register.
Before Federated Department Stores merged Rich's and Macy's, I had separate credit cards for both stores during my years in Atlanta. This letter included my new, bright-red Macy's card - a perfect color for what happens to many people's budgets when they use it.
(I plan to keep my last Rich's card as a keepsake. Put that with my old Wards card, and I'm building quite a unique bookmark collection.)
I wondered how complete the transition was, so I spent part of Sunday afternoon looking around Peachtree Mall. The number of men in the mall seemed higher than usual - a sure sign there was an off week before the Super Bowl.
Macy's signs are all around the outside of the store at the west end of Peachtree Mall. But inside, a few holdouts remain - with "Rich's-Macy's" logos above cash registers and on a couple of sale tables. This should inspire some people in Taylor County, to know Southern tradition isn't quite stamped out yet.
The old Rich's store had "Sean John" clothes from "P-Diddy" Combs. The new Macy's has an area with "J-Lo by Jennifer Lopez" clothes. It's just like those old commercials used to say - there's always room for J-Lo.
A tour of Peachtree Mall showed a serious shuffle of stores underway. The card shop is moving close to J.C. Penney's. Yankee Candle is moving farther west. It's almost as if the management made every store owner roll dice, to see how many spaces it should advance.
But if you haven't been to the mall in awhile, you'll notice one big item is gone. The giant old-time carousel in the middle of the Food Court disappeared in the last few weeks. There's a big empty circle surrounding by fencing - and as far as I know, no one has used it yet for high school wrestling or folk dances.
Who could have made off with this large, old-style carousel? No carnival has passed through Columbus in months. There's only one obvious suspect - but how would the mall Santa Claus pull a stunt like that?
To get to the bottom of this, I went to the Peachtree Mall customer service desk. It's moved recently as well - from the Food Court area to the entrance near Wolf Camera. But doesn't this mean FEWER customers will be served?
The woman at the customer service desk confirmed the carousel has gone. "Apparently it didn't make enough money," she guessed. As if a mall carousel needs to match the ridership of planes at Columbus Airport....
As far as the customer service desk "concierge" knows, the carousel will NOT be replaced. So it's the latest giant-sized item to disappear in Columbus - joining the missing signs from atop the AFLAC tower.
What does it say about Columbus when it can't even support an old-fashioned carousel for children to ride at a shopping mall? It's enough to make you wonder if METRA buses are making a profit by making sneaky trips to the wrong parts of town....
SPAM-A-RAMA: We haven't offered this look at our spam e-mail in awhile, but a message this past week was irresistible. The message came with the title "Arson Pizzeria" -- so I thought it might be new information about the recent fire at Cross-Country Plaza.
No, the spam message had nothing to do with arson -- but it did have something to do with pizza. It was very matter-of-fact:
Your night has been confirmed with Janice.
Time: Evening
Location: Her Home within 1 mile of you
Attire: Dress casual, bring swimwear
Expectation(s): Pizza/movie, then the "real" fun...or whatever comes first.
Quote from Janice: "My husband is out of town for the whole week. If the first affair goes over well, let's just say it will be a wild week. Bring your trunks for the hot-tub too. I have all my lingerie ready for this. Can't wait to meet you."
Confirmation: It is up to you to hold your time with Janice. Please confirm within the site to validate your visit. You can get a better look at her body and chat before you head over.
Janice? Janice WHO?? I don't pin my driver's license on the outside of my T-shirt when I going jogging in the neighborhood, so how would she know who I am?
It turns out this deceiving spam offer is one of many I've received lately, offering the opportunity to have a rendezvous with cheating married women. It sounds like these offers are inspired by the TV series "Desperate Housewives" - yet I've had no offers to do an "Extreme Makeover" of my apartment.
A link with this spam promised me the opportunity to check a picture of Janice. I dared to click on it - and wound up with photos of several women in various stages of UN-dress, none of them named Janice. It's so frustrating when web sites like this update their home pages every couple of hours....
The web site noted this was a service exclusively with cheating wives. Men looking to meet single women are advised to go elsewhere -- but I tried that when St. Luke Church started a singles group months ago, and it hasn't met since.
I would have to pay to become a member of this group -- then I'd apparently meet Janice and see her hot tub. But I decided not to do it. For one thing, I don't want to break up anybody's marriage. For another thing, I can go walking around my neighborhood and peer into backyards for hot tubs at no charge.
E-MAIL UPDATE: We mentioned Sunday there were two uniformed Columbus police officers at a Saturday evening church service we attended. That led to this reply:
Dear Mr. Blog Writer,
Did you know that the officers that you spoke of working at that church you visited were working a PART TIME job, one of many that they do work? You sir, are entitled to your opinion.....hopefully you will not have to experience what "is our city safe" is saying the hard way. Then we shall see if the tune to your repertoire changes
So they're only part-timers on duty at a church? Considering this was Cascade Hills, I'd think they'd have the money to pay the police the rest of their salaries....
(I've even more amazed that Cascade Hills Church had police in the foyer. At other congregations in town, the pastor would have cried "racial profiling," ordered the officers to leave, then called a news conference demanding resignations.)
I suppose this is a "half-empty, half-full" area, but I don't mind officers working part-time. To me, part-time beats no time at all. In fact, I've heard of cases where part-timers do better work than full-timers -- but enough about the staff at WRBL.
Of course, I don't want to experience what "Is Our City Safe" is writing about. I actually try to avoid it - for instance, by driving at the speed limit.
And about changing "the tune to your repertoire" - you know, I've been meaning to ask people if they think I should record a second album....
Now before we close, let's heat some quick Sunday leftovers:
+ Meriwether County schools called off Monday classes, apparently because of continuing power outages from the ice storm. So apparently we can't call them ALL-weather schools....
+ The Georgia Force opened the arena football season by edging New Orleans 46-44. The game was played at Atlanta's Philips Arena - which seems strange, since there's a perfectly good indoor stadium for football right next door to it.
+ Instant Message to WLTZ/NBC-38: How many calls did you get at noon Sunday from upset Democrats - the ones expecting a John Kerry interview on "Meet the Press," and instead finding Pat Robertson praising President Bush and Iraq on a special "700 Club?"
BURKARD'S BEST BETS: Men's slippers as low as nine dollars at Dillard's.... Mrs. Fields'-style brownies for $1.99 at the Library Café.... but gas for $1.87 a gallon at the 13th and Veterans Parkway Chevron? C'mon....
To offer a story tip, make a donation or comment on this blog, write me - but be warned, I may post a reply.
If you quote from this in public somewhere, please be polite enough to let me know.
© 2003-05 Richard Burkard, All Rights Reserved.