^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

4 APR 04: HOW TO CATCH A PIG

Before we get to our topic - have you noticed what day this is? It's 4/4/04. Maybe we should celebrate by spending some time on "all fours" today.

But anyway: The first thing you notice about the Piggly Wiggly store on Brown Avenue these days is the big hole in the parking lot. A sinkhole formed in front of the store several days ago, and swallowed a car. You almost wonder if Rainbow/PUSH is boycotting this chain again.

"Shut your mouth!" my elderly next-door neighbor said when we drove into the parking lot Friday, and I mentioned seeing the sinkhole on TV. Then she started praying out loud that the same thing wouldn't happen to MY car. I appreciate her doing that - but my Honda's almost ten years old, and the insurance IS paid up on it....

We stopped at the Piggly Wiggly on Brown Avenue so my next-door neighbor could buy a jar of coffee. She said all she'd had for breakfast was a little oatmeal. She reminds me of my mom, who usually only drank coffee for breakfast. I didn't know it could be so filling.

I decided to go inside the store with my neighbor, and get a snack for later in the day. I settled on a big bag of tortilla chips costing $1.50 - yet at the checkout, the scanner showed it costing $1.89. I didn't get a lot of sleep this past week, but the numbers on the shelf didn't seem that blurry.

"I thought it was $1.50," I said to the Piggly Wiggly cashier.

"Apparently not," the cashier answered. Of course, if the computer was always right, Microsoft should have sent me a big check by now for spreading that "test" e-mail all over the Internet....

I caved in and paid the $1.89 plus tax - but my next-door neighbor wasn't ready to check out yet, so it gave me a chance to double-check the price. Sure enough, the shelf tag said $1.50. And only then did I discover a sticker on the bag of chips said "SPECIAL $1.50." We journalists have such wonderful powers of observation.

Armed with this evidence, I went back to the very same Piggly Wiggly checkout lane. Another woman was with the cashier, and she took charge of things when I pointed out the $1.50 sticker on the bag. She provided me a 41-cent refund - which I had to sign a receipt to receive. As if 41 cents is enough for filing a lawsuit?!

What happened to me is a reminder that supermarket scanners are NOT always accurate, and you should watch the check-out process with care. The Piggly Wiggly staff told me the price of the tortilla chips simply wasn't up to date. But $1.50
has been the price for several weeks -- so you cat help wondering if some ethics fell in that sinkhole, too.

BIG PREDICTION UPDATE: I searched all over my radio dial Saturday night - but sure enough, Georgia Tech's basketball game could NOT be found. What does it say about Columbus when no station even jumps on a bandwagon for a team in its own state?

Georgia Tech won a tense test, to reach the title game in NCAA men's basketball. Former coach Bobby Cremins was spotted in the crowd in San Antonio - but now he may be worried about having his court in Atlanta be renamed for Paul
Hewitt.

(I didn't know until Saturday night that the Georgia Tech basketball court was named for Bobby Cremins this season. How did he outbid McDonald's for this honor -- and is his face going to be on the center circle?)

Maybe it's too late to ask this, but has anyone at Auburn considered Bobby Cremins for the basketball head coaching job? For that matter, EITHER of them -- men or women?

Consider his record: Georgia Tech went from also-ran to consistent winner under Bobby Cremins. He knows the Southeastern Conference, from his years playing at South Carolina. And he can't get any more gray hairs from rebuilding the
program.

Before I forget the Final Four - Instant Message to CBS Sports: How did you arrange for "TROY" to sponsor Saturday night's Final Four games? Troy State didn't even win a game in the N.I.T....

BLOG UPDATE: The St. Jude Dream Home was awarded to a Columbus family Saturday evening. No, my friend at church did NOT buy a $100 ticket. The way things are going, he'll need that money to pay for the gas to drive to and from church.

Speaking of church, my Pastor suggested this weekend recent flooding in Massachusetts is God's punishment for that state's Supreme Court declaring same-sex marriages legal. I can't wait to ask him whose sin led to the flooding in West Point last spring.

COMING THIS WEEK: A final wrap-up of our serious spring cleaning.... and the most unusual commercial endorsement we've seen in quite awhile....

To offer a story tip, make a donation or comment on this blog, write me - but be warned, I may post a reply.

If you quote from this in public somewhere, please be polite enough to let me know.

© 2003-04 Richard Burkard, All Rights Reserved.