BURKARD'S BLOG

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3 AUG 03: FREE SPACE

I awoke at 5:05 this morning, after hearing outside - well, something. In my neighborhood, the noise could have been anything. Traffic on the Oglethorpe Bridge, trash trucks emptying dumpsters - everything except maybe people heading for an early church service.

Peering out the bedroom window, I saw a man in a tan-colored outfit standing outside Apartment #2 next door. I didn't have my glasses on, to get a good look at him. Those glasses were so expensive that I'm thinking about buying a safe for them.

The man stood there, and I decided he was harmless. After all, people want to see all sides of a home before they invest money in it....

At 1:15 this afternoon, my whole perspective on that man changed. My neighbor told me someone had broken into Apartment #2 during the night -- and sure enough, the back window was wide open and a big hole was in the glass. Remember: when hammers are outlawed, only outlaws will have hammers.

Apartment #2 is vacant right now, and it's very obvious when you look inside the front window. Was this man outside homeless, and looking for a place to sleep? Wouldn't the ticket manager still sleeping at Golden Park take any roommates?

(Maybe this man didn't quite understand the news of the last few days. Items in stores are free of sales tax. That does NOT mean you can stay somewhere free of charge.)

My neighbor urged me to be careful, in light of the break-in - then she mumbled something she's mumbled before about drug dealers in the neighborhood. When she starts talking quickly like that, I wonder if she's in a witness protection program or something.

For some reason, my neighbor did NOT call police about the break-in at Apartment #2. She left that to me -- but I had to call 9-1-1, because the Columbus Police administrative number has a voice-mail message after hours. On weekends you either have to panic, or be really patient.

As I write this, two police officers have just come to inspect the damage. They found the back door to Apartment #2 unlocked. So whoever broke in through the window isn't THAT big an exercise fanatic....

I pointed out to the officers some charcoal briquets in the high grass, near the back window of Apartment #2. They did NOT take any of the briquets for evidence - not even for a "National Night Out" party on Tuesday night.

The police officers didn't even dust the window of Apartment #2 for fingerprints. I'm not sure why not. Maybe they figure the guy plans a long-term stay, so he'll leave more?!?!

One of the officers took my name and phone number, saying he's about to need a new notebook. In a way, it was comforting -- to know I'm not the only person in town still without a P-D-A.

The officers say they'll have to wait for the landlord to file a report about the break-in Monday. I tried calling the landlord after they left - but he doesn't even have an answering machine on his office phone. Maybe if he had one, people would be calling about Apartment #2 and it would be occupied.

I'm working an overnight shift these days - so my apartment next to the broken-in #2 will be empty all night tonight. What do I do about this? Hide my valuables? Put a box full of big cockroaches in the window sill?

COMING MONDAY: We check how diverse Columbus really is....