27 AUG 07: WHEN TAXES ATTACK

The last ten years have taught us there are "red states" and "blue states." Unless, of course, you live in Alabama - where for at least one week every November, part of the state is Crimson red and part of the state is Tiger blue.

Perhaps it's time to bring out a new political crayon - and draw in which cities and counties are "money green." Tuesday will be a good time to do that, as four different jurisdictions in East Alabama hold votes on raising property taxes. To some critics, of course, they shouldn't be considered "proper" at all....

All of Tuesday's property tax votes have something in common: improving public schools. Auburn High School's principal told WRBL a new band room is needed, because only half the band members can fit inside it now. But maybe there are other solutions -- like fewer tubas. Or even asking obese students to lose some weight.

The proposed property tax increase in Opelika schools would be used to build a new high school. Principal Stan Cox says the current school is set up so one light switch controls an entire hallway of classrooms. At some Wal-Mart stores, this is applauded as an example of energy savings.

Stan Cox says Opelika High School's infrastructure has reached the point where you can't operate a microwave oven and a coffee maker at the same time. So your property tax money can build a new state-of-the-art teachers' lounge.

Lee County Schools also have a property tax vote Tuesday. That money will cover an area from Loachapoka to Smiths Station -- so how the money is divided could come down to which town can go to military bases in other states, and recruit more incoming Fort Benning soldiers.

Lee County's interim superintendent notes plenty of portable classrooms are in use these days, due to high enrollment. He describes the need for a property tax increase as "urgent times four." I think Matt Drudge would go all the way, and call that a bulletin.

The biggest sales job to promote a property tax increase seems to have been made in the Phenix City schools. Superintendent Larry DiChiara says even before base realignment, his district has been seeing large increases in enrollment. Who would have guessed so many parents would flee Russell County schools like this?

Superintendent Larry DiChiara has held several public forums to promote the property tax vote in Phenix City. Yet to my knowledge, there hasn't been a widespread campaign for people to vote against it. That would have happened weeks ago in Columbus, because.... oh wait. Maybe not. There's no real call-in show on radio anymore, to get it organized.

Perhaps Larry DiChiara is concerned about what a Phenix City blogger has written, opposing the Phenix City property tax question. The "Redneckin" blog has been skeptical from the start - almost as if the writer wants every newly enrolled child brought to his house for a count.

Redneckin's writer Chuck describes himself as a "libertarian with a small l." His comments about the property tax question have seemed more like something a full-fledged member of the Libertarian Party would write. They appeal to people's heads, with little of the emotionalism that we could have if children sang about how poor their parents would become.

In some 22 August "thoughts" on the property tax question, Chuck of Redneckin warned Phenix City rents will jump if people vote yes Tuesday. He said landlords will pass on their higher tax bills that way. This may explain why the Phenixian has been described as "high-end" condominiums.

Chuck of Redneckin also warns a "yes" vote on the property tax question will mean annual increases for homeowners, due to property reassessment. It's almost enough to make you root for more sub-prime mortgages to fail, and more lending companies to collapse.

We asked here months ago why the Phenix City school district needs a property tax increase for school improvements, since it recently received millions of dollars from a state bond issue. We could ask that same question about all the districts having votes on Tuesday - but we're awfully busy, like many voters are likely to be when they don't mark ballots.

It's also puzzling to hear about Phenix City schools growing in attendance, because Fort Benning schools are not. The latest issue of "The Bayonet" reports enrollment on post has dropped so much in the new term that the fall youth soccer season has been canceled. Wouldn't seven-a-side play give young players more room to run -- or is there concern they might keel over?

BLOG CORRECTION: Oops -- it turns out Bob Knight WAS at the Little League World Series with the Lubbock, Texas team. We didn't realize it until ABC mentioned it during Sunday's final game, in an interview with Georgia Governor Sonny Perdue. Don't you wonder if Knight recognized Perdue as a college coach, from the movie "We Are Marshall?"

Sonny Perdue's old Little League town is the new world champion - as Warner Robins beat Tokyo 3-2 in an eight-inning thriller. Yet after the winning home run was hit, ABC Sports showed "second straight title" on the screen. For Georgia, maybe - but c'mon. About the only thing Columbus and Warner Robins have in common is a secret disdain of Macon.

Several of last season's Northern All-Stars were in the stands Sunday. I assume they were rooting for Warner Robins American to win the Little League title -- and may have been checking to see if their autographs had appreciated in value from last August.

The winning manager of the Warner Robins American team was Mickey Lay. I can already hear the motivational speech for 2008 - with a Lay saying, "Nobody can win just one."

Meanwhile, Columbus has another baseball team to root on. The Catfish lead their division with a week to go in the regular season, and sacked Savannah Sunday night 8-4. As long as another scattered thunderstorm doesn't knock over the fence at Golden Park, we could have home playoff games.

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