for 2 DEC 06: SPOT THE DUMMY

(BLOGGER'S NOTE: You may find this item humorous, serious, or a little of both - but we offer these thoughts from time to time, as we keep a seventh-day Sabbath.)

Whatever happened to the Crash Test Dummies? Not the rock band - I mean, the talking "dummies" who preached safe driving habits for years. They seem to have disappeared. And they haven't shown up in any videos from Iraqi insurgent groups.

I may have been in the company of dummies, at an event the other night. At least, that's what one woman in the group said. She referred to a nearby table as "the dummy table." And to make things clear - no, we were NOT playing bridge.

There was nothing noticeable to me which made it stand out as a "dummy table." But the woman left no doubt about what she meant - explaining two male relatives were sitting there. You can tell nowadays which women never watch Dr. Phil McGraw, or read his books.

"Is there a reason why you're saying that?" I finally asked the woman, after she used the words "dummy table" for at least the third time.

"If you knew them, you'd understand," the woman answered. But from the label she put on her relatives, I'm not sure I wanted to know them - unless I had a financial scam I wanted to pull.

As far as I know, this woman was sober. But her words struck me as seriously out of line -- especially in the presence of a total stranger like me. If she was a pro football player calling out her coach, maybe I could understand it....

Some people have accused me of picking on my pastor at church too much here. But he DOES have good qualities. In all the years I've heard him preach and speak, he's never told a joke putting down his wife. He would call himself a dummy, long before labeling his wife as one. He's never even called her the "old lady" - which could be because he's older than she is.

My pastor has never called attention to how he speaks about his wife. But I've certainly noticed it -- especially compared with other preachers and speakers I've heard. I'd like to think this is a husband showing love for his bride. At least, he's smart enough to realize you don't put down your spouse when people can quote your words back to her.

I believe my pastor's example is right, while the woman talking about the "dummy table" was not. The safe driving announcements used to say, "You can learn a lot from a dummy." Sometimes you also can learn a lot from the people calling other people dummies, too. You might even come to a different conclusion about whom the REAL dummy is.

COMING SUNDAY: An "aftertaste" about West Point water....

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