for 16 DEC 06: CAN YOU CANDLE IT?

(BLOGGER'S NOTE: You may find this item humorous, serious, or a little of both - but we offer these thoughts from time to time, as we keep a seventh-day Sabbath.)

Friday night marked the start of an eight-day event which large numbers of people celebrate across the country, and around the world. Before you jump to conclusions - no, the start of college bowl season isn't until next Tuesday.

It's the event passionate Christmas keepers seem to forget, when they rage against people who say "Happy Holidays." You know, the group which declared last December, "We almost lost Christmas!" -- somehow ignoring all those movies, animated cartoons and music specials on television.

Do you know what eight-day event I'm talking about? Ask most people in Columbus, and they'd probably be stumped. That's because this event doesn't receive the attention here that it does in other cities -- and there's no big local publicity stunt to promote it. So it's different from the charities which want TV crews at their gift giveaways, so show how wonderful they are.

The event I'm talking about is Hanukkah, the "festival of lights" kept by many Jews. The lights are kept on a candelabra called a "menorah" - which should prove this religion is NOT for women only.

As best I remember, I was first introduced to Hanukkah in fourth grade. Another fourth grade teacher who happened to be Jewish came to our class and talked about it. I don't think she won any conversions that day. Maybe if she had talked more about the eight days of presents....

When I lived in the Atlanta area, a co-worker who was the daughter of a rabbi invited several of us to her home for a Saturday night Hanukkah party. A group of grownups spun dreidels for candy - and I wound up taking home a tall cup full of Tootsie Roll miniatures. You poker players in Columbus had better get ready....

But you don't hear much about Hanukkah in Columbus, mainly because the two local rabbis tend to play it down. They call it a "minor holiday," and actually seem to discourage synagogue members from having big celebrations of it. The less money spent on gifts, the more can go in the offering plates.

Perhaps they're wise to tone down Hanukkah this year, after the fuss a Seattle rabbi caused this past week. He threatened a lawsuit against the airport, because Christmas trees were displayed without a menorah. The trees were put away for a while - and who knows, some travelers with allergies might have been thankful.

When something like the Seattle controversy occurs, you see the undercurrent below the seasonal surface. You see, "'tis the season" for occasional emotional name-calling. If you don't celebrate Christmas, you're labeled a "Grinch" or a "Scrooge" - sometimes by the very people who condemn profiling the rest of the year.

But it's unfair to label people grinches, simply because they aren't as enthusiastic about Christmas as you are. Maybe they're keeping Hanukkah. Or maybe they've read their Bibles - where there's more evidence a Jew named Jesus kept Hanukkah than Christmas. In fact, do you notice the New Testament never talks about Christmas parties?

If you haven't guessed by now, I don't keep Christmas. I stopped keeping it years ago, persuaded otherwise by the evidence in my Bible and history. But the pressure certainly mounts from all sides when December comes. That's why I tend to avoid the mall in December - and I'm thankful GPB hasn't brought out the "Three Tenors Christmas" show yet to annoy me.

(And at the risk of stepping on toes: I also avoid all Santa Clauses. I get close enough to lies and frauds when it's campaign season.)

So do I keep Hanukkah, you ask? No - although from time to time it's crossed my mind. I went to a workplace "holiday party" several years ago, prepared to declare Hanukkah my holiday. But so much Christmas stuff filled the room that the other event was nowhere in sight. I might have been better off marking Jerry Seinfeld's Festivus.

While I've never driven there to see it, I understand Fort Benning displays a Hanukkah menorah along with a Christmas tree. Perhaps Columbus doesn't do this because the rabbis are laying low about the event. But in the spirit of "One Columbus," wouldn't it be accommodating to put a menorah somewhere? Or would the candle lights be "borrowed" to display in someone's front yard?

The other day I heard on the radio news about how Bainbridge, Georgia is considering a "free speech" area in a city park. It was suggested so a nativity scene can be set up - but some city officials are concerned such a free speech zone might invite controversy. Imagine the people waving Confederate flags in that child's face....

But if you're going to have "free speech," you should be evenhanded for all faiths. Chicago radio announcer Steve Dahl made a great suggestion about this years ago. Rope off one area for Christmas keepers, with trees and nativities. Rope off one area for Jews, with a Hanukkah menorah. Then rope off a third empty area, and post a sign - saying it's for everybody else. Even if it lumps me in with the atheists.

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