BURKARD'S BLOG
25 MAY 03: MONEY BACK
"Do you want this?" a little boy asked me as I walked past an apartment in my complex last evening. The boy was offering me some folded money, with a five-dollar bill on the outside. Talk about desperation - people are trying to pay off journalists on their day off.
It was surprising to see this boy with an expanded "Afro" hairdo, looking no older than ten, offering me a wad of money. I wasn't quite sure how to respond. After all, what if his dad was inside - and it was his drug money?
It was the Sabbath day for me, so I tried to do the right thing. "It isn't MINE," I said of the money packet -- then walked on my way. Other people probably need that money more than I do. And that little boy didn't need the spanking his parents probably would have given him.
All of this leads me to ask some questions about money-related offers I've seen lately on TV:
+ Has anyone ever sat through all 30 minutes of the "Chip Ellis The Bank" info-mercial? How many times do you need to hear him say, "I'm the real deal," before you get the point?
+ Who is this new guy doing ads for Budget Car Sales -- the one acting like he's having autistic fits about "all these CAR-AR-AR-ARS" ? Can't some prescription sedative be given to him? Or are they hiring West Central Hospital patients for commercials these days?
+ Did WTVM ever get enough donations to pay for "Operation Thanks?" Or will we see twice as many commercials during newscasts in June?
BLOG UPDATE - The Pastor of the church I attend made another surprising offer this weekend. He's now asking people to raise their hands, if he makes a misstatement during the service. (27 Apr) He'd better hope a group of Southern Baptists doesn't show up someday.
My Pastor's latest correction involved a comment last weekend on celebrity current events. He claimed Brad Pitt was caught with pistols in his car - "after he went to Iraq calling for peace." It turns out Sean Penn did those things, not Brad Pitt. After all, if Pitt went to Iraq, he'd have to wear a shawl to hide his highlighted hair.
After the church service, someone pointed out to a Local Elder he was drinking "spring water." (He always brings a bottle of Dasani with him.) To which I stumped the Elder by asking, "But what are you going to do when it's summer?"
Are you a reader of this blog? If you are, please e-mail me. It gets lonely doing this by myself.