16 DEC 08: PRO SPORTS, PRORATION

OK, let's see if I have this straight. Auburn University has five million dollars sitting around, to pay off a football coach. But Alabama public schools have to cut their budgets 12-and-a-half percent, because money is tight. Yes sir, this is a state with its priorities in order....

I couldn't help noticing the irony of two big news conferences in Alabama Monday, held 30 minutes apart. First Auburn University officially presented a new coach. Then Governor Bob Riley announced a large reduction in state education spending. You almost get the feeling Gene Chizik plans to do a lot of recruiting in Florida and Tennessee.

Gene Chizik declared to reporters at Auburn University he's the "right hire" to replace Tommy Tuberville. I suppose football fans want a head coach who's confident. But keep one thing in mind - South Carolina has a mascot named "Cocky," and that university still can't win the Eastern Division.

Gene Chizik realizes the microscope he'll be under at Auburn University. He told reporters the bottom line is: "You've got to win." Clearly that's not a qualification for the job, but still....

Gene Chizik went on to say: "I know the importance of football at Auburn. I know the importance of football in the state of Alabama. I get that." So do countless grade school teachers, who now wonder if their jobs are secure.

Gene Chizik didn't sit around Auburn long after his news conference. We're told he went out right away to begin recruiting. In a way, he has to do this - because Tommy Tuberville has shown no sign of putting his home on sale.

(The Opelika-Auburn News reports Tommy Tuberville was spotted at the holiday party of Auburn President Jay Gogue. There, doesn't that prove it? Doesn't that prove Tuberville resigned? Why would you bring a fired employee to your party, where he might get drunk and spill all the secrets?)

Auburn Athletics Director Jay Jacobs told WRBL afterward he was "not trying to win the news conference" with the choice of Gene Chizik. In a way, that's too bad - because there were times when Notre Dame had problems under Coach Lou Holtz, yet his news conferences kept everyone on his side.

But Jay Jacobs hasn't won over everyone with this choice of a new football coach. Former Auburn basketball star Charles Barkley declared it was a race-based decision, because University of Buffalo coach Turner Gill didn't get the job. Well, hold on here. Maybe Auburn feared people would confuse Turner Gill with former Ledger-Enquirer sports reporter Christa Turner.

Auburn graduate and pro football player Carlos Rogers was on hand to back Gene Chizik. Rogers challenged Charles Barkley's view, saying you don't need an African-American person in charge to bring change. Hmmmm - which candidate did Rogers support for President?

So that just about wraps up our blogging for.... oh wait. I almost forgot that other news conference, by the Alabama Governor. Live too close to the state line, and their mentality can rub off on you.

Governor Bob Riley announced Alabama public schools will have their budgets reduced 12.5 percent. This cut is known in Alabama as "proration." In contrast, soldiers who served at Fort Rucker years ago never were pro-rations....

The Alabama Governor has to make this 12.5 percent cut to balance the state budget, because tax revenues are down. Keep those Ladonia and Opelika gas prices below Columbus, and I'll be glad to help them out.

The evening news noted Lee County schools may have to make five million dollars in cuts, to meet proration. You'll know it's bad when grade-schoolers are asked to share meals from the same lunch box.

Governor Bob Riley also announced a hiring freeze for Alabama state jobs. Ahhhh - so that's why the Auburn head coach had his news conference first....

But what does it say about our times when the new Auburn football coach is the top story on so many TV newscasts, while a big cut in education spending is down the list? When Lee County Schools have to trim about as much money as Tommy Tuberville's "golden parachute?" Maybe some "Golden Apple Award" teachers need to start holding news conferences, and doing commercials for lunch meat.

NOW we can move on, to other Monday news items:

+ Which local activist has launched an e-mail campaign to give the Columbus Mayor a raise? Jim Wetherington is only about $30,000 behind the City Manager - and we probably could get by with 99 new police officers, instead of 100.

+ Electoral College delegates gather at state capitals, to confirm the Presidential election. Reps. Carolyn Hugley and Calvin Smyre could have been Democratic electors. But Barack Obama failed to carry Georgia -- and some might say in response, Mr. Obama failed to carry Jim Martin into the Senate.

+ WRBL reported Emanuel Jones is spending about $25 million to buy the old Bill Heard car dealerships. Let's see - I think that computes to about 100 fully-loaded Cadillacs.

+ The Arena Football League suspended its 2009 season, due to financial problems. That means the Georgia Force will NOT play in the spring, but the minor-league Columbus Lions will. It'll be wonderful to see the busloads of desperate football junkies, coming here from Atlanta.

+ Instant Message to everyone who came here Monday morning looking for a blog entry, but finding none: Sorry, that was my fault. The entry saved automatically as I clicked the "post" button - and those simultaneous actions stored the entry, but didn't post it. Unlike some of our polls, this is one time when a tie does NOT go to the blogger.

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