The Blog of Columbus, Georgia

Wednesday, December 10, 2008

10 DEC 08: MACON ARGUMENTS

Ooh boy - that envelope which landed at our front door apparently was filled with hidden explosives. The incoming District Attorney faced federal grand jury questions Tuesday. Her old law partner was questioned on TV. And when the outgoing District Attorney calls us at home without our even calling him, you know it's an unusual day.

District Attorney Gray Conger called your blog to say we had it wrong Tuesday, about Mark Shelnutt and low criminal bonds. "I fought him for years on that," Conger said, explaining Shelnutt went around his office to various judges to obtain those bonds. We never meant to say Conger cooperated -- we simply said Shelnutt gained them. It may all come down to the fastest phone fingers....

(Yet Gray Conger admitted he never realized Frank Lumpkin III had received such a low bond, for his effort to retrieve a stolen car. Mark Shelnutt is NOT involved in that case - well, unless he's been hired by the mother accused of shoplifting.)

We also asked Gray Conger about the big news of the day, involving the woman who beat him in the District Attorney's race. We'd received an e-mail about that Monday night, from the person who left the envelope about Julia Slater:

Dear Sir.

With much anticipation I await the response that Ms. Slater gave you for your blog tommorrow. However, if she made any comments that mirror her performance in the televised debate on WTVM back in October, then I probably know the gist of it. In October Ms. Slater was in a debate with DA Gray Conger on WYVM. One of the questions asked of Ms. Slater was if she would comment on the pending investigation of her law firm. Ms. Slater responded that she knew of no investigation. I must assume then that Ms. Slater is blind and deaf because a number of the employees of that firm have been to testify in front of the Federal Grand Jury in Macon GA these past six months.

If you call Ms. Slater tommorrow, she will also be in front of the Federal Grand Jury in Macon GA, at 10am to be precise. She will be testifying on a number of things, to include money laundering, tax evasion, and campgain contributions.

I understand you spoke with her to get her side of the story in regards to the envelope I sent you. Did she deny the investigation to you as well?

Enjoy.

Julia Slater denied to us she knew about an investigation of Mark Shelnutt. But then, so did Shelnutt on the Tuesday evening news. He said no one has subpoenaed him to testify before a grand jury, and no one has told him he's an investigation target. Shelnutt the man is not exactly the "Berry, Shelnutt, Day and Hoffman" law firm - and the boundary line could be his picture not appearing in Yellow Pages ads.

The TV news contacted the U.S. Attorney's office in Macon Tuesday, but people there would not specify what they're investigating. It was implied Julia Slater was a grand jury witness only, NOT a target. The attorneys at this law firm might be wise not to even shop at Target for awhile....

Yet here's the thing - Julia Slater's attorney declared Mark Shelnutt WAS a target of the grand jury investigation. Page Pate said.... hey, wait a minute! The incoming District Attorney, who's a practicing attorney, has HIRED an attorney?! This explains all those pages of ads in the phone book.

But anyway: Julia Slater hired Page Pate, a criminal defense attorney based in Atlanta. No, she did NOT hire a Columbus lawyer. So Slater is avoiding a possible conflict of interest as Muscogee County District Attorney - but she might get a demerit from the Columbus Chamber of Commerce.

(The attorney's name raised an eyebrow with us - but we found no evidence online that Page Pate is related to Muscogee County Democratic Party Chair Alice Pate. Yet Page Pate makes campaign donations to Democrats, and Julia Slater is a Democrat. Is that enough to link all this to Barack Obama?)

So what does District Attorney Gray Conger have to say about all this? He told me he's known for months about an investigation of Mark Shelnutt - and he claims Julia Slater knew it, too. But Page Pate told the Ledger-Enquirer Slater was subpoenaed in the case only two weeks ago. There's nothing like a grand jury trip to invigorate someone's memory....

Gray Conger's office deferred to federal prosecutors, when it comes to the accusations mentioned in a Harris County courtroom and outlined in Tuesday's blog entry. The District Attorney thinks something will come out of the investigation, but he declined to say exactly what. After all, a grand jury in Macon may decide Columbus is conducting small-town business as usual.

Gray Conger seemed to agree with the "puppet master" assessment contained in the envelope at our front door. He says Mark Shelnutt has handled much of the District Attorney transition. So when Julia Slater makes a promised announcement today about staff members, Shelnutt might be named Executive Assistant. Or Consultant. Or maybe even Life Coach.

Gray Conger didn't stop there Tuesday night. Contrary to Julia Slater's claims that Mark Shelnutt is witnessing interviews with staff members, Conger claimed Shelnutt is "doing some of the questioning -- in a right aggressive manner, I'm told." Aha! Some of this evidence could be overruled, on grounds of hearsay....

I told Gray Conger I appreciated him calling to express his "point of view" on these things. Oops. "It's more than my point of view," he corrected me. "It's facts." A good prosecutor never tells the jury what his "opinion" is in a case, does he?

Gray Conger concluded our chat by saying the next few months "should be interesting," as Julia Slater takes over his office. I should have asked Conger what he'll be doing in those months - but I admittedly was so stunned by his after-hours phone call that I didn't have any questions ready. And since he's still in office for three weeks, anything I said could be used against me in a court of law.

By the way, Gray Conger asked if we knew who left that mysterious envelope at our front door the other day. We told him we were not sure. After all, this blog has a reputation to uphold from several weeks ago - for conducting terrible investigations.

As the news broke concerning the incoming District Attorney Tuesday, the Muscogee County Republican Party issued a statement - not about Mark Shelnutt, but the arrest of the Governor of Illinois. You'd think the name "Slater" would be much easier to spell and pronounce....

E-MAIL UPDATE: Now to the "order" side of Law and Order....

It has now been more than 7 months since Columbus Police Officers Roscoe Castle and Jeffrey Foxx were taken off the street while the Office of Professional Standards investigate them for beating a handcuffed subject.

While being video taped my by the Muscogee County Jail security cameras, Officer Castle can be seen physically beating a handcuffed prisoner. Officer Foxx appears to be trying to stop Officer Castle.

When formally interviewed, both lied about the incident.

I am curious as to what is taking so long to investigate. Maybe its because the Chief is waiting to see if the stink blows over. Way to cover up things Chief!

We called the "OOPS" area of Columbus Police about this Tuesday afternoon. There was no response to our message Tuesday night. Maybe we'll get a call back after undercover detectives are finished spying on the new district attorney.

We also have an update on a local Elvis impersonator -- or at least he used to be:

Richard, Reference your comments concerning Michael Jordan. He didn't travel from Columbus to LasVegas to observe the OJ Simpson sentencing. He has been living and performing in Las Vegas for over two years now. He probably had just gotten off work when he went to the courtroom (which is why he was in his "Elvis Jumpsuit"). I'm sure your remember how Elvis worked at night and slept during the day.

Thanks for the clarification. It turns out Michael Jordan still uses a 706 area code from Columbus, as he offers "nationwide telephone singing telegrams featuring Elvis." At 79 dollars each, the price certainly is not "In the Ghetto."

Michael Jordan's business web site includes pictures of his appearance in Las Vegas court for the sentencing of O.J. Simpson. He even appeared a few weeks ago on an MTV program starring Paris Hilton. Elvis going to Paris?! I thought his limit was Blue Hawaii....

We'll stop the e-mail train there for today, thank all of you for writing, and now quickly wrap up other Tuesday news:

+ Columbus Council approved a new meeting schedule. Starting in January, the first Tuesday of every month will be reserved for proclamations -- so (ahem) get your whereas-ses over to the Government Center and enjoy it.

+ Columbus Council also heard about improvement plans for Oxbow Meadows. WRBL reported the proposal includes a "festival field." Isn't this asking for trouble? Lose a bug there during the "Insectival" and you might never see it again.

+ WLTZ attended the reopening of the RiverMill Café on First Avenue. It survived the Bibb Mill fire nearby with practically no damage. But please, don't
ask for any "flambee" desserts....

+ Auburn University students organized a campus march in support of former football coach Tommy Tuberville. But it appeared only about 100 people showed up. Nick Saban had that many people waiting at the Tuscaloosa Airport, when Alabama hired him - and they weren't all sports reporters, either.

+ The Columbus Cottonmouths nicked Knoxville 3-2 in overtime, to end an eight-game losing streak. If this streak had lasted much longer, the Snakes might have been forced to hold a Sarah Palin Look-Alike Night.

SCHEDULED THURSDAY: Your input on our latest Hurtsboro issue....

The number of unique visitors to our blog is up 32 percent from last year. To advertise to them, offer a story tip, make a PayPal donation or comment on this blog, write me - but be warned, I may post your e-mail comment and offer a reply.

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The views expressed in this blog are solely those of the author -- not necessarily those of anyone else in Columbus living or dead, and perhaps not even you.

Monday, December 08, 2008

for 9 DEC 08: PARTNERS IN CRIME?

The envelope was dropped mysteriously on my doorstep during the middle of the day. I never heard it arrive, as I was sleeping. Fill-in work at night has forced me to rest by day lately -- and if the neighbors would please cooperate by not testing their noisy cars, I could rest a bit better.

But anyway: the envelope contained a three-page typed letter and a DVD -- all of it dealing with incoming District Attorney Julia Slater, and her longtime law firm partner. The anonymous letter called Mark Shelnutt "The Puppet Master." Only in this case, he's not even working from behind a curtain....

The DVD contains court transcripts of seven separate hearings from March 2007 to March 2008 in a Harris County drug case. It also has video recordings of three hearings - each far too lengthy for us to post at YouTube or a similar site. Besides, none of them have dancing dogs or brawling hockey players.

The three-page letter notes the Harris County drug case had nine defendants. Four of them were represented by four attorneys from Mark Shelnutt's law firm. "Shelnutt had represented ALL the defendants at one time," the letter says. "This is a Conflict." Really? What if they all deny they did it, and say "The Man" is hiding somewhere in Eufaula?

Some of the court transcripts we received actually deal with a perceived conflict involving Mark Shelnutt. We were directed to comments by attorney Derrick Wright -- who said his client was told by Shelnutt where to find drug money owed by some defendants. Shelnutt's law firm even represented the client in a divorce case. I never knew this firm had more customers than Ken Nugent.

At this February hearing, Mark Shelnutt responded by saying Derrick Wright "slandered" his character - adding: "None of that's true." Then at a March hearing, Shelnutt noted Wright had "been disciplined by the State Bar for lying." If you didn't know better, you might think they both were running for political office.

Judge Bobby Peters eventually determined Mark Shelnutt's law firm had a conflict of interest. "The law firm is out of this case for these individuals," he declared. That meant Julia Slater was ruled out as a defense attorney for one drug suspect - and Peters may have put himself in position to fill in for Donald Trump on "The Apprentice."

Julia Slater admitted there were conflicts in that case, when I asked her about it Sunday. But she disputes the idea that she'll be Mark Shelnutt's "puppet" once she becomes District Attorney. Slater notes she's acquainted with most of the defense attorneys in Columbus. And based on her campaign promises, she may meet the rest in Recorder's Court.

The three-page letter goes on to link Julia Slater and her law partner further:

Now. Julia Slater wins the DA's office with Mark Shelnutt's help. Julia Slater will now be giving all kinds of deals to the Shelnutt firm. If you are guilt of a crime, hire Shelnutt. You'll get the best deal in town. The change Slater so actively campaigned for will be going from putting criminals in jail, to giving the best deal to the highest bidder.

If you don't think so, go to the 8^th floor of the Government Center, look down the hall way across from the law library and you'll see a glass door for the Marshal's Office Conference room. Inside you will see Slater interviewing the current employees of the DA's office. You will also see Shelnutt sitting right next to her. Pulling the strings. Slater has announced to the legal community that she has asked Al Whitaker, a defense attorney who just lost the Superior Court Judge's seat to Gil McBride, and lost to Gray Conger in the DA's run off four years ago, to be her new Chief ADA. Guess he figured if he couldn't get the deals Shelnutt is gonna get, he may as well get a steady paying job.

So, you think Shelnutt will continue to pull the strings with Slater in Office. Why would you bring in a Defense Attorney who is not coming to the DA's Office, into the interviews of the people in the DA's Office? Why would you continue to associate with a person up for a Federal Indictment? Would you want a DA who gives unbeatable deals to the defense attorney who put her in office, helped pick her staff, and may bring her down as well.

This is what the public didn't know.

I can remember when this sort of anonymous accusation was made before the election - not after the fact, when it's too late to change the outcome.

We were too busy for a few days to take the author up on the challenge to visit the Government Center - but others apparently did. The Ledger-Enquirer reported Mark Shelnutt sat through Julia Slater's interviews with potential staff members. Richard Hyatt's web site openly wondered why Slater would do this. And transfers from Chicago probably said, "Our officials handle things more carefully than this."

Julia Slater explained to me she's asking all the questions in job interviews. Mark Shelnutt is alongside her merely for note-taking, she says -- and he's not the only one. Slater named Andy Sparks as another witness to the questioning. Yet so far, no Sparks are flying in his direction.

Julia Slater notes Mark Shelnutt is worth calling, as he once was an Assistant District Attorney. But she repeated the statement she made during the campaign, that Shelnutt is NOT under a federal investigation [3 Oct]. The sooner a Democrat becomes President, the more confident that statement is likely to be.

But Julia Slater is confident she can prosecute cases fairly next year, even if Mark Shelnutt is at the defense table. But it's clear from this anonymous envelope that at least someone in Columbus is skeptical. Keep something in mind, though: Shelnutt gained some low bonds for suspects while Gray Conger was District Attorney -- and if Slater goes any lower, she might as well hand out "Get Out of Jail Free" cards.

An early deadline means several e-mails will be held for another day. Let's quickly wrap up Monday headlines:

+ Place Properties terminated plans to buy the old Baker High School property, citing a lack of financing. Maybe now the outside will get a long-overdue new coat of paint.

+ The Muscogee County School Board approved a contract for new Superintendent Susan Andrews. WRBL reported she'll have a base salary of $170,000. So how much more will she make, if Kendrick wins another state title in girls' basketball?

+ Police arrested 11 Jordan High School students for staging an outdoor protest. They apparently support the mysterious teacher who's accused of having affairs with students. In some countries, this would be called a harem.

+ WXTX "News at Ten" reported Auburn University students plan a march today, in support of former football coach Tommy Tuberville. If the marchers do this well enough, we might have the start of a football flag corps.

+ Alabama's Nick Saban was named the Southeastern Conference football coach of the year. Alabama's Julio Jones was named freshman of the year. And I'm a bit surprised former Auburn offensive coordinator Tony Franklin wasn't named scapegoat of the year.

+ Instant Message to Zoo Atlanta: So I'm clear - Xi Lan is the name of a baby panda, right? It's not the name of some prescription drug that's sponsoring the panda exhibit?

BUT SERIOUSLY: It was sad to learn Monday of the death of Atlanta radio host Mike Kavanagh. I worked with him at CNN Headline News, writing scripts he would read on the air. But if you ever heard him, you realized he had a fabulous voice for radio. News anchors with beards don't tend to stay on TV that long.

Mike developed an interest in financial planning during his years at CNN. It came in very handy, as he eventually hosted the Sunday morning "Money Matters" program on WSB-AM in Atlanta. If my money wasn't committed elsewhere, I certainly would have left it in his hands - as he seemed to care about his customers, as well as his co-workers.

Funeral arrangements have not been announced for Mike Kavanagh -- but if they're scheduled in Atlanta, I plan to attend. Kavanagh died of a heart attack Saturday, on the day he turned 57. How curious and sad that he helped people prepare financially for retirement, yet never reached it himself.

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The views expressed in this blog are solely those of the author -- not necessarily those of anyone else in Columbus living or dead, and perhaps not even you.

8 DEC 08: COMPLAINER-IN-CHIEF

Your blog admittedly is in a quandary today. You've voted for "Hurtsboro Mondays" to end. You've also voted to allow the outgoing constable of Hurtsboro to keep writing us. And in the last week, he's e-mailed us three more times -- making six messages in two weeks. This man should have his own blog, yet he probably realizes this one has a lot more readers.

THE BIG BLOG QUESTION on the Hurtsboro Mayor's presumed trash offenses ended Sunday night with a deadlock. Half the voters say Rayford Tapley should pay a fine, even though the statute of limitations has expired. Half the voters say he should not (8-8). And so far, no one has proposed giving the mayor a financial bailout by paying the fine themselves.

This poll was suggested by outgoing Constable Robert Schweiger, and he quickly wrote a comment declaring, "No one is above moral law." Did you realize tree trunk dumping at a public landfill is a matter of "moral law?!" He's apparently read the Bible verse along those lines -- and now may be waiting for Mayor Rayford Tapley to be charged with murder.

The Constable was challenged by a writer named "Freeman," who called Robert Schweiger a "vindictive old man who has nothing better to do than harass others who are in positions that he thinks he should be in." Maybe Hurtsboro needs a more active senior center, with daily canasta games.

Freeman's criticism led to the constable's first message of the week, which reached us last Monday:

"Sir" Richard:

Thanks for posting the BIG BLOG QUESTION that not only refers to Tapley ( he's just a local example) but also seeks out the public's opinion on even handed justice.

In checking the comments - it was easy to identify Freeman. He is of the same ilk as Tapley. While in "Hurt'sboro; he was Tarver and Tapley's toadie, and is presently facing charges for disobeying a city ordinance that everyone else is expected to obey Tapley and White are doing their best to protect him!

His spelling and poor grammar may be just a sham. But his use of obscenities and twisted facts make him stand out like "a fly in a pan of milk!

I was busy today with research, and I confirmed that the completion of the obstacle course in 90 seconds is required by POST for ANY aspirant for police officer certification.

You must push a patrol car from a standing start a specified distance. Scale a 6' wall or fence. Crawl through a window opening. Drag a 175# dummy a specified distance, and walk a 20' balance beam before you are given a passing grade. These obstacles are spread out over 100 yards more or less.

Tomorrow, I intend to contact the Administrater Director of Courts to get first hand facts about the seperation of powers between between the police and court..It's apparent that; at this point, Baxley is wearing both "hats."

One more point, before signing off. IF Baxley succeeds in getting his "cars" in operation. And IF he succeeds in hiring officers, will the "juice be worth the squeeze?" There will have to be a lot of citations issued to cover the cost of maintainance, equpment, uniforms, insurance, and wages that the program will need.

It's not just a pipe-dream, it's a nightmare! Save the suffering! Turn it over to the county!

Constable R.J. Schweiger

Mr. Schweiger should be careful talking about "shams." My WordPerfect software counts four spelling errors in this e-mail - not to mention a double use of "between."

We mentioned the accusation against Freeman in the B.B.Q. comment section, NOT mentioning who the accuser was. He/she responded by calling the accusation a diversion by Robert Schweiger, which "shows how narcissistic he actually is." In a town the size of Hurtsboro, figuring out the accuser may be a simple process of elimination.

But anyway: POST stands for "peace officer standards and training." Can Hurtsboro's Police Chief meet the standards listed by Robert Schweiger? Jim Baxley told me Sunday night he thinks he can, at age 67. In contrast, "Freeman" declared the 78-year-old Constable a "hypocrite." Now there's an exercise challenge on Main Street simply waiting to happen....

Jim Baxley told me his granddaughter really is the Hurtsboro Magistrate Court Clerk. She's making all the decisions, but he's admittedly "training" her in the job. Apparently the training does NOT include arresting the Constable to shut him up.

Robert Schweiger apparently wanted to wage a "get out the vote" campaign with our question, because he wrote us twice more last week. If he had done this sort of thing back in May, he might have won his campaign for Russell County Commission.

But we decided to delay the last two messages, because he had his own "wrestling pit" already at the Big Blog Question. So now we present message #2, from Wednesday:

"Sir" Richard:

I'm proud of you, and a bit disappointed in your readers! They seem to enjoy being spectators, more than becoming involved. In other words, "Let George do it!" I acknowledge that my battle in "Hurt'sboro is high priority with me. But, even handed justice should be everyone's concern.

Tapley and the shenanigans in "Hurt'sboro merely provide an epic example of what transpires everywhere. It's with this in mind; that I turned to your BLOG; and you have responded by investiging and publishing the facts of the matter. You have showered far more attention on "Hurt'sboro than could reasonably be expected. But still, The Big Blog Question on any issue lacks activeity in the ammount of votes it gathers.

I can tell you from experience that it is difficult to present your plight to the "mainstream" media. Any submission to the Ledger-Enqirerer that appears on the Opinion Page can be counted as an "accomplishment!" Any submission to the Citizen is an exercise in futility! And, even "Top Story" segments on TV newscasts are accorded seconds of time. Every media outlet extends an opportunity to respond to their writings or airings. I wonder what the numbers show?

In an effort to capture interest, and to allow your readers to make a comparison of their own situation I offer the following.

Rayford Tapley is a charlatan! His "fast" start is just a publicity stunt! There's still no evidence of a bookkeeping sweep! Nor to my knowledge have an council vacancies been filled! The few potholes that are "patched," lead a path directly to his residence. Furthermore, the work was done by Water Works officials, using Water Works equpment and materials. Tapley provided two labors to the four (4) hour project. The open dump fostered by Tapley's unlawful deposit of refuse continues to draw garbage on a regular basis and stands as his memorial as surely as if it were named in honor!

Oh yes. He has sworn in his confidant as the police chief. Now we have a department head who rides the streets aimlessly, and has
failed to provide security at the bank on at least one occasion. The Chief had no "clue" as to where he could refuel the "squad" car.when it came up empty So, over the week-end the "Chief" took the keys and the car home and the officer coming on duty couldn't find it!

That's enough for now, even though many more comparisons could b made to "Mayberry." Yes, it's funny! But it's equally tragic. Place yourself in this position. Would you be willing to tolerate your rights being trampled. I think not! Prove me correct by voting (yes or no) on The Big Blog Question!

Constable R.J. Schweiger

Perhaps many of our readers are spectators when it comes to Hurtsboro because they've had their fill of Hurtsboro. Someone wrote recently at InTown Columbus, "The Hurtsboro B.S. gets really old!" As old as the e-mail writer, I suppose....

Since the mayor of Hurtsboro still hasn't returned our phone messages, we'll leave the accusations against him open and awaiting a response. But the halftime feature on NBC's "Sunday Night Football" showed another small Alabama town where people do several different tasks at once. If Water Works employees can dig holes to repair the lines, they can refill holes as well.

As for the Hurtsboro police chief, Jim Baxley admits he had to stray from the bank a couple of times last week. Reports of dead bodies take priority - but there's no confirmation that Hurtsboro residents are dying from a lack of things to do.

Chief Jim Baxley says the people at Hurtsboro's bank "understand" when other events call him away. But as I remember, the Constable has handled bank security from time to time -- and it's part of his duties. Does HE have a perfect attendance record? And if the bank is keeping track of that, does it mean few people deposit money there?

On Wednesday "Freeman" commented at the B.B.Q. that he plans to write a book starring an "ol con" who tries to make as many people as possible angry, and files frivolous lawsuits to boot. That led to message #3:

"Sir" Richard:

I've held my tongue for a few days, watching for new developments and giving you time for other topics. Besides - I wouldn't want to be given a fifteen (15) yard penalty for unnecessary roughness while everyone is "thinking" football.

I'm definitely amused by Mr. (or is it Mrs.) Freeman. and his accusations and ambitions.

If he's going to write a book - he (or is it she) had better improve his composition skills. Furthermore, if I'm to be the "whole" show - it will just be a bio.! I can help him with "casting".The leading lady can be the "mare", The plot could be a tale about corruption, a cowardly "Kop" and the workings of a kangaroo court. The possibilities are endless and the closing scene could leave us wondering about a sequel! Perhaps the spin-off could be titled THE TAPLEY ERA!

Back, here in the "real" world nothing has changed. The smoke created by the TV interview has dissipated and there still has been no audit, nor credible street repair.or new police officers out on the beat.

Our new police chief is busy hopping back and forth between being a magistrate and polishing his badge. So far, he has run out of gas, warned one of our ministers about being on the streets in a golf cart without a "fanny" flag (where is he at when the ATV's are drag racing on Main Street) and speeders are zipping in and out of our school zones.he has also failed, on more than one occasion, to provide security at the bank.

The Criminal littering issue remains in limbo. The open dump was inviting to someone who provided a Thanksgiving dinner for the Buzzards. They threw their garbage right in front of Tapley's tree trunks. Perhaps Mayor Tapley is just a bird lover, but if so, he shouldn't discourage others from using the sanctuary by prosecuting them!

I suffered a terrible loss about a week ago. One of my band of "merry men" went AWOL! He was one of my most trusted, and I certainly will miss him.

He became just another casualty in the battle for "Hurt'sboro. He succumbed to battle fatigue and conflict of interest

. He actualy fought longer than I - and often cautioned that we were engaged in an exercise in futility. Perhaps he was right - but I intend to see this war through to the bitter end!!

Constable R.J. Schweiger

P.S. Please vote on the BIG BLOG QUESTION

Jim Baxley confirmed he still has only one police officer on the Hurtsboro staff, and he's trying to recruit more. And yes, he did warn a minister about his golf cart - because Alabama law requires any vehicle traveling less than 25 miles per hour to display a hazard triangle. Even in a slow Southern town, you sometimes can be too slow.

So here's the quandary we face: I could set up a separate "Blog of Hurtsboro" to handle all the e-mails from the Constable, but I don't have time for that right now. I barely have time to keep up our poker blog. So please write us with your suggestions about what we should do -- because I'm confident one person will keep writing, about what the city of Hurtsboro should do.

E-MAIL UPDATE: One of our Sunday discoveries spurs a reader to comment....

Hide the children-- a Columbus/Phenix City native ELVIS Wanna Be is especially sensitive to the modus operandi of murderers---

The article you linked about the sentencing of OJ in Las Vegas, states that Michael Jordan, the son of the WRCG's oldest caller, Barbara Jordan, has an opinion on ego:

Jordan, dressed in Elvis garb, said he wanted to see Simpson, whom he described as "arrogant," sent to prison for years.

"The ultimate ego booster is if you can commit double murder and get away with it," Jordan said. "This has been 13 years of waiting for justice."

Someone needs a mental health break! Sounds like he has a criminal mind. He thinks murder is an ego booster! He thinks getting away with murder is the ultimate ego booster! Sounds like he thinks murder is a game! Interesting disconnect to restructure crime and punishment to a delusional game of getting away with it:

"The ultimate ego booster is if you can commit double murder and get away with it."

Sounds to me like he wants to be like the original Elvis Presley - who was named an honorary member of the F.B.I.

Now let's analyze some other items from the weekend:

+ The price of gas passed another milestone, falling to $1.49 per gallon at the Opelika Kroger store. But the set-up at Tigertown isn't quite right - because you have to walk all the way across the parking lot, to go inside the store and buy lipstick to go with it.

(We also found the Crawford Road Crown station at $1.58 per gallon. As far as we know in Phenix City, Crown is king.)

+ The Irish Tenors performed at the RiverCenter, as part of Winterfest. I'm waiting for a children's chorus from that country to come to town - you know, the Irish Tater Tots.

+ Alabama was selected for the Sugar Bowl, to play undefeated Utah. The Crimson Tide fans will go to New Orleans and enjoy the rollicking atmosphere. Some of the Utah fans will go there and declare it a Mormon mission trip.

(The reader who predicted Ohio State would make a B.C.S. bowl turned out to be right. The Buckeyes will take on Texas in the Fiesta Bowl. I suspected one of the big games might take Texas Tech instead, for some entertaining offense - but they went for the "bucks" in more ways than one.)

+ New Orleans knocked off the Atlanta Falcons in pro football 29-25. Matt Ryan scored his first pro touchdown for Atlanta - but in the end, the Gulf Brees for New Orleans simply was too strong.

SCHEDULED TUESDAY: A mysterious envelope left at my front door, and an accused woman's response to it....

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The views expressed in this blog are solely those of the author -- not necessarily those of anyone else in Columbus living or dead, and perhaps not even you.

Sunday, December 07, 2008

7 DEC 08: ONE MALL. THAT'S ALL.

Long-time readers know I have a rule at this time of year: only go to the mall if it's an absolute emergency. Usually there isn't one. I have plenty of sweaters on reserve for this December cold wave....

But what if shoppers didn't have a mall to visit? Rumors along those lines apparently have been going around Columbus for weeks. It finally led to a couple of e-mails our way:

Please excuse if you have already covered this-

Is it true- or is it just a rumor?

Will Peachtree Mall close after Jan 14, 2009?

Have stores been notified that the mall is closing and filing for bankruptcy? If a bankruptcy does occur, will the stores be forced to leave/close or will the bankruptcy allow for it to change hands and allow the stores to stay in the mall?....

you might check Charlotte Russe

Is this possible? Could bankruptcy next door at Bill Heard Chevrolet spread like a cancer down the street?

This didn't seem like a big enough emergency for me to visit Peachtree Mall, so I made some phone calls Friday instead. Besides, a single guy like me walking into a women's clothing store like Charlotte Russe wouldn't feel quite right -- and who picks up a date, simply to research a blog rumor?

"I've heard the rumors," said a young woman named Ashley who answered the phone at Charlotte Russe. But after asking around, she admitted no one specifically had been told Peachtree Mall was closing. So maybe this was really a Charlotte RUSE....

But before I called that store, I had called the Peachtree Mall management office. "Heavens, no!" exclaimed a woman who answered the phone when I mentioned the rumor -- but she then admitted she'd heard the claim as well. She must not have made an attempt to turn the rumor around, by shopping at all the stores.

The woman transferred me to the man in charge of Peachtree Mall. General Manager Chris McCoy told your blog it will remain open for years to come. OK, that's nice - but did someone ever make that statement about Columbus Square Mall?

Chris McCoy agreed with me, when I said the bankruptcy speculation actually surrounds Peachtree Mall's corporate owner. General Growth Properties has a billion dollars in debt, and Friday's New York Times reported it has hired bankruptcy lawyers. Hopefully they bought their suits at Dillard's or Penney's....

A spokesman for General Growth Properties the New York Times plans to sell four malls in the western U.S. But he says its malls "will continue to operate" no matter what happens. Otherwise, Peachtree Mall's stores could move everything outside to the parking lot - and compete with the Lee County Flea Market.

Chris McCoy told me Peachtree Mall's year-end sales are "going very well," beginning with a good Thanksgiving Friday. I should have asked him about the injury crash which reportedly occurred outside Dillard's around 4:10 a.m. on that Friday. Was the line of cars THAT long to get to the 4:00 opening of Penney's?

There's one big "anchor store" at Peachtree Mall which currently is vacant. I asked Chris McCoy about the status of the old Parisian store, but he didn't know anything beyond the fact that Dillard's owns it. C'mon, Mr. Dillard - cut a low-priced deal, and let high-priced Neiman-Marcus come in.

Chris McCoy wanted me to spread the good news about Peachtree Mall. So there you have it -- but I still have this funny feeling the calendar shop won't be around after February....

E-MAIL UPDATE: While the rumors swirl around Auburn University football, a reader noted something we mentioned Friday....

"The Auburn side of the story was spelled out at a midday news conference by Athletics Director Jay Jacobs. I had to double-check that title after seeing it on TV -- and yes, he's "Athletics" Director with an S. Perhaps he added the extra letter because he's not really that athletic."

People from the UK would assume Jacobs was the track coach.

Yes, they might indeed reach that conclusion. Of course, the British also would wonder where Tuberville's team received permission to pick up the "football" and run with it.

Saturday night's news added a new name to the replacement list for Tommy Tuberville: University of Buffalo coach Turner Gill. His team upset Ball State to win the Mid-American Conference title - so I guess this makes Gill "MAC Daddy" of the year.

But here's the thing about Turner Gill - he's African-American. Are football fans in Alabama ready for such a major college football coach? Or will some of them point to Sylvester Croom, and sound like latter-day Adolf Hitlers?

And what could O.J. Simpson possibly have to do with Columbus? This e-mail surprised us....

Richard,

Reference the news coverage of the OJ Simpson sentencing: In articles on the web and in various newspapers throughout the US and overseas is a photo of an Elvis impersonator watching the sentencing in the overflow room at the Las Vegas Courthouse. This Elvis Tribute Artist happens to be from the Columbus area (a graduate of Smiths Station High School and Auburn University). As a matter of fact he is a former DJ on a Columbus radio station and also formerly worked at WTVM and did his college internship at WTVM.

I'm familiar with Michael Jordan, from his visits to businesses to croon for women celebrating birthdays. I even saw him with his family one night, eating dinner at Stevie B's Pizza. If he stood up to perform after-dinner entertainment, I left before it happened.

Michael Jordan told a Las Vegas newspaper he considers O.J. Simpson arrogant, and Friday's sentencing ended "13 years of waiting for justice." OK - but why travel there from Columbus to see it in person? In an Elvis Presley outfit, of all things? Did Jordan need to hurry away from the hearing, to be an emergency fill-in at a casino stage show?

We need to make follow-up calls on three other items e-mailed to us, so please be patient for a couple of days. In the meantime, let's check other weekend headlines:

+ A Columbus Police car went out of control on Illges Road, smashing into a telephone pole and three parked cars. This is why you haven't seen any crime reenactments from "Crimestoppers" in several years....

+ Rivertown Church confirmed it has dropped its weekly Saturday evening service. When I worshiped there, the top Saturday attendance might have been 50. Now I'm attending with a different group, which also has about 50 people per week - and the people there somehow think everything's fine.

+ Dunkin Donuts announced in an ad its store on Manchester Expressway will close for two months of renovations. The work apparently will begin after the new location opens downtown. But down the expressway, another shop already may be calling it a Golden Goldmine.

+ Carver High School's bid for back-to-back football titles ended, with a 41-12 crushing by Cairo in the semifinals. Is that why the lights were at McClung Memorial Stadium Saturday afternoon? Was Coach Dell McGee working the Tigers through more fundamentals?

(If that's not bad enough, someone broke into the Carver band room during the game and stole all sorts of items. Police say MP3's, cell phones and textbooks were taken - and it's sad to think about which one of those three won't have any street value.)

+ Alabama lost the Southeastern Conference championship game to Florida, 31-20. I went to a Phenix City fast food restaurant for dinner during the third quarter, and heard a worker describe business there as "a ghost town" until the game ended. Hopefully he enjoyed closing shop early for the night....

+ Troy University won the Sun Belt Conference football title by ambushing Arkansas State 35-9. This league should work like professional wrestling, with the champion receiving a title Sun-Belt.

(Troy will play in the New Orleans Bowl in two weeks, against Southern Mississippi. The Troy radio announcers emphasized it's "important" to buy tickets through the university. Don't trust those guys standing on the street corners in the French Quarter - because you might wind up with Saints tickets.)

BURKARD BULK MAIL INDEX: 1,020 (- 20, 1.9%)

The views expressed in this blog are solely those of the author -- not necessarily those of anyone else in Columbus living or dead, and perhaps not even you.

Friday, December 05, 2008

5 DEC 08: MOM VS. THE BOSS

Some events or news items tend to bring out the skeptic in people. It could be a coaching change in sports, a UFO sighting - or even a Clinton joining the cabinet of President-elect Obama.

So it was in Auburn and Columbus Thursday - as skeptics abounded concerning the change in Auburn University's football coach. I heard several people declare Tommy Tuberville fired, as opposed to the official term "resigned." A few even took the conspiratorial route, and made it sound like long-time Auburn Trustee Bobby Lowder watched it all from a parking lot.

The skeptics picked up a key piece of evidence Thursday. Tommy Tuberville's mother Olive told the Opelika-Auburn News her son "was fired," and did NOT resign. But before you rush to conclude a mother would never lie about her son, remember one thing - our recent items about the Frank Lumpkin III case.

Olive Tuberville spoke up as reporters went to the Tuberville home in Auburn, hoping for a comment from the former coach. How many of them privately hoped he'd say something along the lines of hockey player Sean Avery? After all, Tuberville's "firsts" in the Southeastern Conference came at Mississippi.

Alabama head coach Nick Saban seemed to put himself on the skeptics' list, regarding Tommy Tuberville. In a statement, Saban said he might be "5-7 away from the same thing." Now now, coach - I think a national championship would give you at least one year of immunity.

Auburn University officials insisted Tommy Tuberville resigned, and was NOT booted. For one thing, Wes Byrum had enough trouble this past season booting field goals....

The Auburn side of the story was spelled out at a midday news conference by Athletics Director Jay Jacobs. I had to double-check that title after seeing it on TV -- and yes, he's "Athletics" Director with an S. Perhaps he added the extra letter because he's not really that athletic.

But anyway: Jay Jacobs said he tried to talk Tommy Tuberville out of resigning Wednesday - not once, but three times. Of course, Jacobs finally realized that it's "one-two-three strikes you're out" of the old ball game.

Jay Jacobs admits Auburn University is NOT required to pay Tommy Tuberville millions of dollars to buy out his coaching contract. But he says the university will pay it as a "thank you" gift for ten years of success. If a corporate executive received a golden parachute like this right now, Congress would be outraged.

Tommy Tuberville is keeping quiet for the moment about his departure from Auburn University. Before he waits for the best coaching offer from other colleges, he could be waiting for the best offer to pay him for a tell-all interview.

Overlooked in Tommy Tuberville's resignation is the fate of his assistant coaches. Rachel Baribeau said on WEAM-AM's "In the Zone" Thursday at least one Auburn assistant heard the stunning news on a recruiting trip, while in a high school player's living room. He should have Auburn job applications stuffed in his briefcase, to offer the father at moments like this.

So who should be the next head football coach at Auburn? The speculation seemed to begin within minutes of the resignation announcement. Say what you will about the end of "mill towns" in the South - the rumor mills just keep rolling along....

The Opelika-Auburn News rushed out an instant editorial, warning Auburn cannot afford to make a bad choice. Why, of course not. Paying six million dollars to Tommy Tuberville may have drained all the reserves in the athletic department.

Alabama Governor Bob Riley even spoke up about the Auburn coaching situation. As a member of the Auburn Trustees, he says he'll offer a couple of names for consideration. Come to think of it, Republican Jay Love needs work after losing the race for Congress....

I have a couple of coaching ideas for Auburn to consider, but I won't feed the rumor pot by mentioning them here. I'll only offer this advice -- do NOT go after Kansas coach Mark Mangino. We Jayhawk alumni have come to like the guy. And besides, I'm not sure his overweight body could stand the stress of moving to the heat and humidity of Alabama.

BLOG CORRECTION: We have fixed Thursday's entry to correct the name of a former Auburn football coach. Tommy Tuberville succeeded Terry Bowden, not Tommy. The fact that no one called that error to our attention may reveal how forgettable Bowden's tenure at Auburn was.

We've been so busy with other projects this week that a couple of submissions from readers are on hold for the moment. In the meantime, here's a quick check of other Thursday items....

+ The evening news reported a Jordan High School teacher is under investigation. The unnamed female teacher may have been intimate with a student. Jordan is a "Vocational" high school - but I thought that sort of vocation was limited to Victory Drive.

+ State Senator Emanuel Jones submitted the high bid in bankruptcy court for the old Bill Heard Chevrolet. Jones hopes to reopen the dealership on Manchester Expressway within two weeks, with the new name "Legacy Chevrolet." Hopefully the legacy will NOT involve a return to those annoyingly loud radio commercials.

(WXTX "News at Ten" reported Carl Gregory submitted a bid for Bill Heard Chevrolet, but it was ruled "not qualified." This doesn't seem fair. Car dealers promise to give credit to almost every customer -- so shouldn't a bankruptcy court follow their wonderful example?)

+ WLTZ had a 6:00 p.m. newscast which was downright bizarre. First, some kind of computer error made the second section of the program appear twice, with no commercial break in between. Amazingly, anchors John Beard and Libby Allison never seemed to notice the difference.

(Then Jeremy Moss began his sports report by confessing he'd just cut himself shaving. That blood line on his chin really shows up well in high-definition.)

+ Instant Message to whomever owned Lady Nana's Restaurant on Crawford Road in Phenix City: I'm sorry to see you've closed. I will resist the temptation to sing, "Nana-Nana, hey hey hey, goodbye."

BURKARD BULK MAIL INDEX: 1,040 (+ 31, 3.1%)

The views expressed in this blog are solely those of the author -- not necessarily those of anyone else in Columbus living or dead, and perhaps not even you.

Thursday, December 04, 2008

4 DEC 08: WASHED-UP "TUB?"

The Auburn University men's basketball team played hard, but lost to Xavier Wednesday night 81-74. That makes three losses in a row for the Tigers, gives them a 3-4 record - and may inspire Coach Jeff Lebo to ask who Tommy Tuberville's agent is.

It was minutes before tipoff time in Cincinnati, when Auburn University announced football coach Tommy Tuberville had resigned. A statement left the impression Tuberville was NOT fired - so apparently he doesn't need the unemployment checks a firing would bring.

The Auburn statement says Tommy Tuberville's contract had a buyout clause, which will be honored. A reader asked here the other day how much that would cost. Opelika-Auburn News reporters believe it totals six million dollars - but it's clear Tuberville is NOT a bionic man.

Rumors swirled around Auburn for a couple of hours, before the official announcement. One was that Tommy Tuberville had some kind of health problem. Of course, he felt last Saturday like he was run over with a hot iron....

The reports about Tommy Tuberville's departure led two 6:00 p.m. newscasts. But WLTZ never brought it up -- not even in the sports section, and not even during "11 at 11." Perhaps Jeremy Moss feared football coaches around Davenport, Iowa would rush to send resumes to Auburn.

Tommy Tuberville's decision was revealed to the Auburn football team Wednesday evening, before the university released its statement. Of course, the players were about as powerless to stop this decision as they were the Alabama offensive line.

(WRBL showed pictures inside the Auburn athletic complex. One player pulled up his shirt over his face when he saw the camera. Why -- was he carrying a concealed weapon without a permit, or something?)

CORRECTED: The university statement quotes Tommy Tuberville as saying he's "going to remain in Auburn and help the Auburn family however I can." If that's accurate, his next job may be in sports broadcasting -- following in the footsteps of Terry Bowden. It beats following in the footsteps of Mike Dubose, and becoming a high school coach in Dothan.

WXTX "News at Ten" showed a group of Auburn students at Toomer's Corner, holding signs supporting Tommy Tuberville. Hmmm - that big buyout should provide enough money to set up a few scholarships....

Tommy Tuberville won 85 games in ten years at Auburn University. He had an undefeated season in 2004, even had a 7-3 record in the Iron Bowl -- and perhaps most impressively, several years ago Tuberville went 1-0 in a showdown with Auburn trustee Bobby Lowder.

But let's face it - this past season was messy for Auburn football. It started well before the first game, when former Carver High School quarterback DeRon Furr had a quarrel with other players and quit the team. People in Cairo could tell you if you can't contain Furr, you're not likely to win.

Then came Tommy Tuberville's most controversial decision. He fired offensive coordinator Tony Franklin, with Auburn's record at 4-2. A team which struggled to learn the spread offense suddenly couldn't cover the spread....

The mid-season firing of Tony Franklin was the ultimate example of Tommy Tuberville's reputation as a "riverboat gambler." Tuberville never really has rejected that label - which will hurt any dream he has of running for political office in Alabama.

If that wasn't enough, another coach with local connections was fired Wednesday. Columbus native Sam Mitchell led pro basketball's Toronto Raptors for four years, and took them to the playoffs the last two seasons. But they're 8-9 this year -- and it appears any losing record with Raptors can make you a dinosaur.

E-MAIL UPDATE: Is Victory Drive coming alive? One reader isn't sure....

Richard, I read a recent article in the Ledger-Enquirer about a new project of Columbus South, Inc. so I decided to go to their website and read more. Was I surprised when I saw that the last minutes of their meetings was posted in May 2005 and the site says it was last updated in May 2006. The contact information lists Bob Hydrick as the Interim Executive Director and that was in 2005. I do recall Reggie Richards as the director for several years, then I remember reading something (in the L-E) about Colin Martin taking over when Reggie resigned and then reading (again in the L-E) something about Lynette Gross being hired. I believe this is an official web site of the Columbus Consolidated Government. So maybe in your spare time you could check this out. Maybe one of the paid employees of Columbus South could update their website. It's hard to take an organization seriously when their website hasn't been updated in more than three years!

The Columbus South web site indeed is dated. But give the creators credit for one thing - they left any pictures of the Baker Village Apartments off the main page.

Maybe Columbus South is waiting for the opening of the National Infantry Museum next year, before doing a "relaunch" of its web site. Or perhaps it's trying to steal away the creator of the Midtown Columbus web site. Midtown people may moan about business development, but at least their web site isn't so poor that it's attached to one for City Hall.

As for the leadership of Columbus South Inc., Lynette Gross left NeighborWorks Opelika in July to serve as its President and C.E.O. Her new project is a committee to find rundown homes, and report them to the city for action. A few people are breathing a sigh of relief about this - the managers of rundown motels.

Now our own rundown of other news that we discovered Wednesday:

+ The Muscogee County Republican Party claimed a woman applied for 22 absentee ballots in the runoff. While the party is suspicious, Vicki Stafford says she merely wanted to help residents of the Hamilton House nursing home cast votes. Blink once for the Republican, and twice for the Democrat....

+ Columbus Council was told a change in the schedule of weekly meetings would require a change in the city charter, and approval from the Georgia Legislature. Isn't this bizarre? A body which only meets 40 days a year has control over Columbus Council meeting even more often than that.

+ Perry County, Alabama commissioners voted to create a "Barack Obama Day" holiday for employees, at around the same time as Veterans Day. This could motivate Charles Barkley to run for Governor even sooner than he planned.

(Yeow - they're creating a holiday to celebrate Barack Obama, before he even takes office as President?! What if he decides federal money for Perry County is wasteful spending?)

+ Georgia Tech's football team accepted a bid to play in the Chick-Fil-A Bowl on 31 December. The game will be played in Atlanta, a short trip down Northside Drive from campus. That sort of exotic travel might attract recruits for the environmental club, but not the football club.

BURKARD BULK MAIL INDEX: 1,009 (- 28, 2.7%)

The views expressed in this blog are solely those of the author -- not necessarily those of anyone else in Columbus living or dead, and perhaps not even you.

UPDATE 1/9:15pm

Wednesday, December 03, 2008

3 DEC 08: THE JOY OF SAXBY

C'mon, admit it - how many of you let out a big sigh of relief Tuesday night? Months filled with political ads finally are over. You'll now get a break for a long while - well, unless Mark LaJoye sends more e-mails like his last one with that 2012 tag line.

The U.S. Senate runoff in Georgia ended with incumbent Saxby Chambliss securing a second term. At our deadline Tuesday night, he led Jim Martin with 58 percent of the vote - so that big "2" on the Martin yard signs turned out to be prophetic.

The runoff vote in Columbus had a few problems. I heard one man complain about going to Edgewood School to vote, only to learn the election packet for Edgewood Baptist Church had been delivered instead. See what happens when they start teaching "Bible as Literature" classes in our schools?

Nancy Boren with the Muscogee County Election Board admitted to WLTZ a few precincts lacked the required "flash cards" for voting Tuesday morning. At grade schools, this shouldn't have been a problem - unless math instruction has changed more than I realized.

Unofficial numbers from the Secretary of State show Muscogee County went strongly for Jim Martin, as it did in November. Harris and Troup Counties went strongly for Saxby Chambliss. So if Carver and LaGrange meet in the state AAA high school football finals, more could be at stake than you might think....

Saxby Chambliss and the Republicans put the runoff election in stark terms. They warned a vote for Jim Martin would allow President-elect Obama to pursue a "radical agenda" for the U.S. So which cabinet position do you think will go to William Ayers - Transportation or Veterans Affairs?

One Republican attack ad warned Barack Obama was "one vote away" from a filibuster-proof 60-vote Senate majority. But this ad overlooked the fact that Minnesota's Senate was also unsettled, and Republicans could win it as well. Truly education was an overlooked issue in this race....

Democratic commercials accused Sen. Saxby Chambliss of being a friend of wealthy Georgians, while telling the middle class to "sink or swim." That was tough language, but it could have been worse. The Democrats could have accused Chambliss of encouraging all low-income Georgians to move to Alabama.

Atlanta political analyst Matt Towery told a TV station the Senate runoff campaigns ranked among the worst-run he's ever seen. He explained both sides spent huge amounts of money on attack ads, when all they really had to do was encourage supporters to vote one more time. But Towery doesn't realize something - all the spending on commercials prevented a deeper recession.

You have to give both Senate candidates some credit, for not taking the runoff for granted. The last four weeks have brought famous names to the Georgia campaign, from Bill Clinton and Al Gore to Mike Huckabee and Sarah Palin. No doubt the Republicans wanted Democrats to go farther, and bring in a socialist like Venezuela's Hugo Chavez.

Jim Martin even held a Runoff Eve rally in Atlanta featuring top Georgia rap stars, such as Ludacris and T.I. Well, Martin never declared himself the candidate who was tough on crime....

For all the months Saxby Chambliss and Jim Martin went at each other, it's hard to believe they were once house-mates at a University of Georgia fraternity. You'd think they would have learned how to conform. You know -- the same Greek shirts, the same music at weekend parties, even drinking from the same keg of smuggled beer.

Might Saxby Chambliss's big runoff win open a larger door for him? Does this Republican's success in a big Democratic year mean he could be a Presidential contender in 2012? I think it's possible. And if we can have a President named Barack, why not one named Saxby?

A few other things made news to us on Runoff Tuesday:

+ Columbus emergency crews responded to at least two calls of burst pipes at apartment complexes, apparently due to the cold weather. This is the time of year when it actually is good to be a "drip."

+ State Senator Seth Harp called for "historically black" state colleges to merge, to save the state money. Harp suggested this also would help end segregation in Georgia. After all, white folks were forced to integrate grades K-through-12 against their will....

(The only real girlfriend I've ever had is an Albany State University graduate -- and she's white. She went to Albany State because it was the state university closest to her home. And no, she never did date me wearing all kinds of "bling" or ordering collards for dinner.)

+ The Phenix City Council voted to settle two longstanding lawsuits. One settlement will pay $70,000 to new Councilor Max Wilkes, who sued when he was fired from a city job. This is the closest thing I've ever seen to a politician receiving a "signing bonus."

+ The Americus Times-Recorder reported Snider Chevrolet is in "receivership," and WRBL found the dealership shut down. If this trend keeps up, the Chevrolet "American Revolution" will end in a victory march by the top executives of Hyundai.

+ The Chambers County Commission voted to dissolve the small town of Fredonia, and a probate judge upheld the vote. In related news, Robert Schweiger could be away from Hurtsboro for the rest of the week on a "fact-finding" mission....

+ Instant Message to WIOL "Mix 95.7" FM: Why? Why should I listen to your non-stop Christmas music, as opposed to Sunny 100's non-stop Christmas music? I mean, is it superior? Do your songs mention Santa Claus 50 percent more often?

BURKARD BULK MAIL INDEX: 1,037 (+ 44, 4.4%)

The views expressed in this blog are solely those of the author -- not necessarily those of anyone else in Columbus living or dead, and perhaps not even you.

Tuesday, December 02, 2008

2 DEC 08: FORMULA FOUR-'09

Columbus State University's new President announced his first big growth project Monday. Should we be concerned that the expansion involves varsity sports, and not something like a new school of pharmacy?

C.S.U. President Timothy Mescon joined Athletic Director Jay Sparks in announcing four new intercollegiate sports programs. All of them will begin next fall - and as Cougar baseball fans will tell you, going four for '09 is a pretty good percentage.

A couple of the new C.S.U. sports surprised me, for different reasons. For one thing, the Cougars will add women's golf. Somehow I never stopped to think about C.S.U. only having a men's golf team. Maybe the women's soccer team started from female fans kicking golf balls in the sand traps.

It only makes sense for Columbus State to add women's golf, since several high schools in our area have top-notch programs. They don't have the exotic photo shoots of some pro golfers, but there's a learning curve here....

Columbus State also will add a varsity rifle program next year. I could make a wisecrack here about members of the Lumpkin family funding it, but I won't....

The addition of this sports also seems logical for C.S.U. A rifle program can coordinate with Fort Benning's marksmanship unit nearby. Northside High School has a successful rifle team. But there could be trouble looming -- if team members are offered big discounts down the street at Shooters.

Perhaps the biggest surprise for me Monday was that Columbus State will add men's and women's track and field. For one thing, the university doesn't have a running track. And most people don't even try to take a lap around the campus, by using University Avenue and East Lindsey Drive.

I'm assuming the Columbus State track teams will use the fancy new track at nearby Hardaway High School. But they'd better be careful with the field events. Hurl a javelin off-line, and someone playing on the Hardaway baseball field could get hurt.

Jay Sparks says the four sports being added by Columbus State are ones where the university "can compete right out of the chute." Well, check that - I guess for the rifle team, it's the shoot.

WRBL noted the new varsity sports will be funded through Columbus State student fees. That's one way to ensure a crowd at a women's golf tournament - remind budget-conscious students that they already paid for it.

But a few sports were left out of Monday's announcement, which also may have surprised some people. Student fees will build a new aquatic center at Columbus State University over the next few years - but there was no word about adding a swimming team. Maybe they're waiting for Auburn swimmers to rebel against their new coaches.

And people guessing Columbus State might add a football team will have to keep waiting. There was NO such announcement along those lines Monday -- but maybe that's a good thing. Wait one more year, and Tommy Tuberville might be available to serve as head coach.

C.S.U. President Timothy Mescon said at the announcement he has a vision of expanding the university's enrollment. It reached 8,000 students this fall. Mescon hopes to increase that to 10,000. And if Peachtree Mall can keep the old Parisian store empty, there might be room for all those extra students to park.

BLOG UPDATE: The Muscogee County School Board voted 7-2 Monday night to offer the superintendent's job to Harris County's Susan Andrews. We'll see if this means any changes in the new administration building -- such as the wallpaper color for the superintendent's private restroom.

A couple of school board members expressed concern that the superintendent selection process was "politicized." They apparently were annoyed by the Ledger-Enquirer and Chamber of Commerce openly endorsing Susan Andrews. But can you really blame the Chamber? It wants new members, and Andrews knows all about that in Harris County....

Board member Naomi Buckner said some people in her district complained about a "good-ol-boy" system taking over the selection process. Huh?! It looks to me like the only white male in the running is going to stay in south Alabama.

-> Our other blog starts with poker, and gets into much more. Pay a visit to "On the Flop!" <--

E-MAIL UPDATE: Back to the sports department, for reactions to the Thanksgiving weekend football action....

I wonder how many millions it will cost Auburn to fire Tubberville?..Poor AU,with a season like this year the next few years will be a recruiting disaster. Perhaps GA and AU should just swap head coaches and call it even..

There's no sign yet that Coach Tommy Tuberville will lose his job. And Auburn fans might not want to overreact, over one losing season in nine years. After all, Alabama let Mike Dubose have about three.

A blog reader in Ohio takes issue with the "Columbus vs. Columbus" bowl scenario we offered Sunday:

Oregon State's loss to Oregon makes an Ohio State vs Georgia matchup unlikely. The loss puts USC in the Rose Bowl and opens up an at large bid for Ohio State to a BCS bowl. It's probable due to Ohio State's huge traveling fan base that a BCS bowl will grab them.

Buckblog

As those college football experts on ESPN like to say - not so fast, my friend. Southern California still has to beat UCLA this weekend. Admittedly, the Trojans are heavy favorites - in fact, about as heavy as the Alabama offensive line.

As of today, only two colleges officially have spots in the Bowl Championship Series. One is Penn State - and the other is the college probably nobody wants, Cincinnati. If Ohio State winds up facing Cincinnati in a big bowl, I'd suggest moving it to the truly cost-effective and neutral site of Cleveland.

Now for our version of a news two-minute drill....

+ A head-on crash on Cherokee Avenue sent a van into the drainage canal west of the road. If the city can't afford to put up a guardrail here, at least it should put that canal to better use. Maybe it should be promoted for kayaking, until the adjustments are made to Chattahoochee River dams.

+ WRBL showed the potential new owner of Bill Heard Chevrolet and Cadillac at the dealership. Emanuel Jones met with the old managers -- which may have some customers wondering if this is a change for the better, or simply like President-elect Obama hiring the same old Democrats.

+ Birmingham Mayor Larry Langford was arrested on bribery charges. One count claims he used bribe money to buy $12,000 worth of luxury clothing. So? Compared with Sarah Palin, he's a budget-conscious cheapskate.

(This is the same Larry Langford who organized a day of prayer in Birmingham in April, complete with the wearing of "sackcloth and ashes." If the mayor confessed his sins then, federal prosecutors may have had a wiretap nearby.)

+ Instant Message to Shark's Fish and Chicken: I see you're taking over the old Arby's restaurant downtown. But what is "Chicago-Style" fish and chicken? Do you serve it in a deep dish?

BURKARD BULK MAIL INDEX: 993 (+ 37, 3.9%)

The views expressed in this blog are solely those of the author -- not necessarily those of anyone else in Columbus living or dead, and perhaps not even you.

Monday, December 01, 2008

1 DEC 08: BADGE OF COURAGE?

At first glance, it sounds like an inspiring story - a disabled veteran from the Vietnam era becoming a police chief. But as we all should know, one person's inspiration can be another person's consternation. That may be why you don't hear about downtown church pastors touring Columbus State University art displays....

We're talking about the new police chief of Hurtsboro, Jim Baxley. He talked with us Sunday, not long after he chatted with the town's outgoing Constable. No, Robert Schweiger sometimes can't even take Sundays off.

Robert Schweiger has been so annoyed in the last week that he's e-mailed us three times. He responded first to what we posted last Monday:

"Sir" Richard:

You sir; are a gentleman and a scholar!! Thank you for your continuing interest in "Hurt'sboro. However, I'm forced to conclude; that even though you are discerning, you don't often recognize, when I'm being facetious! You know yourself; that you will "catch more flies with honey; then you can with vinegar." There's a lot more to the audit story then is being published.

The young woman you spoke with, (really just a girl) is Jim Baxley's granddaughter. She is a single mom who lives with her grandparents and is being channeled into the "mix." She is the new town clerk. She and grandpa are the central figures at town hall.

A lobby seperates the magistrate's offce and the clerk's and in reality, "grandpa" is doing both jobs.

In a one on one conversation; Mayor Tapley told me that a Magistrates salary could be in the $18,000.00 range. And, previously, the town paid their clerk $24,000.00 annually.

But, it seems that Baxley is not satisfied. He wants to be police chief! Tapley again informs, that the position pays up to $27,000.00 a yearr. And, that is the one and only reason Baxley wants the position.

If such a move is made, our costs of training Baxley as a magistrate will go down the tube! Baxley cannot wear two hats.- Especially the headgear of chief and magistrate. So, if my arithmetic is correct, the reorganization will simply add $27,000.00 to our budget, plus the cost of replacing the court's magistrate!

Here's your chance to wax satirical, "Sir" Richard - Baxley drives a vehicle with a disability tag, and yet he feels he can pass POST requirements. Even IF he only has to take the "short" course; there will be a car to be pushed, a wall to climb, and a series of pushups, and sit up's in a minimum ammount of time. Even young men wince at the thought. It's all a glorious pipedream!

Don't be surprised if you never hear a word either by E-mail or any other means from T0wn Hall. She just wanted your address so they could keep an eye on the Ol' Constable.

Constable R.J. Schweiger

This e-mail required some confirmation before we posted it. For one thing, some people still consider the label "single mom" a bit embarrassing. Or is the Constable sneakily trying to suggest women for me to date?

Jim Baxley did indeed answer our questions by phone. He confirmed his granddaughter is now Hurtsboro Town Clerk. He also confirmed she's a single mother -- but keep in mind, her mom isn't running for Vice President.

Jim Baxley also confirmed he had to give up the position of Magistrate, when he became Hurtsboro's Police Chief last Monday. He explained that's required under Alabama law. The phrase "judge, jury and executioner" doesn't really apply anywhere - unless perhaps you're one of those attackers in Mumbai.

Instead of waxing satirical, I chose to ask factually - what is Chief Jim Baxley's disability? He explained he has diabetes, which can be considered a disability faced by Vietnam veterans. Robert Schweiger should be careful about picking on veterans - because Georgia's Jim Martin would never let him hear the end of it.

But Robert Schweiger says Jim Baxley has even worse health problems than that. He makes that claim in a letter to the Ledger-Enquirer - which perhaps to one's surprise was forwarded to us:

The word, power can be defined in many ways. But, simply put, it is the ability to control. In life everyone falls into line and retains, or relinquishes to others, some semblance of their god given right to control their destiny. Not everyone can be a leader.So, in a democracy, we have the privelege to choose those who will govern.and literally lead us by our "noses" for specified periods of time.But, for whatever reason, many fail to vote and leave it to mere chance, as to what the future holds.

On the other side of the coin. There are those who are feverish to gain power by any means! These scoundrels are sel-serving. and quickly forget the promises made during their "run" for the position. Along the way all, will have incured obligations that cannot be ignored.and personal favors that must be repaid. This holds true ; from the White House in Washington D.C., all the way down to the potholed streets of "Hurt'sboro Alabama.

Our attention is held in focus by the nation's economy, the wars we are waging, educating our children,illegal immigration, and of course, the immorality that's rife everywhere. It would be difficult indeed, to find a Corporate Executive,a Union leader,a Wall Street executive,or any politician,who is lilly white and hasn't taken advantage of, or abused the authority vested in them.

Here in "Hurt'sboro, it's time to take our eyes off of the TV and look out the window. We are never going to receive any attention beyond our own horizons! And there's no Better day in sight.

We recently elected a mayor who's slogan is; "You just have to outcrook them." He has broken the law at will, and continues to do so. We now have a police chief; who has heart trouble,a torn rotator cuff, and a Disability tag on his personal vehicle.We have three "junk" police cars, a "Junk" garbage truck, and very few hand tools for our city workers to use.

We no longer have a magistrate for the Municipal Court. But, that's a blessing. It will limit the ammount of miscarriages of justice that "Judge" Ken White can hand out. The list goes on and on, and the abuses keep piling up. I guess the best plan for all is to - close the blinds - and make sure our TV sets are compliant with the digital switchover.

Constable R.J. Schweiger .

Hurtsboro Police Chief Jim Baxley flatly denied to me he has heart trouble. But he speculated with his tongue in his cheek: "Maybe he thinks I don't have a heart...."

Jim Baxley says his health was checked by a doctor six months ago, including a test on a treadmill. You know you've passed that test when you don't feel the urge to cry like George Jetson: "Jane, stop this crazy thing!"

Yes, Jim Baxley says he has a torn rotator cuff. But he says he's had that problem for more than a decade - and a couple of weeks ago passed a firing range test, shooting with both hands. This makes Baxley two hands better than Barney Fife in Mayberry....

Jim Baxley is confident he can fulfill all the responsibilities of Hurtsboro Police Chief. They include overseeing one police officer - although he hopes to hire four or five more by early next year. Perhaps then the squad cars which Constable Schweiger considers "junk" actually will be moved, and be in service.

About those police cars: Chief Jim Baxley told me one of them has an "oil-gas mix" which needs fixing. But he hopes to have its battery checked today. That's "its," Mr. Schweiger - not "his."

What about the Hurtsboro Mayor, who's already accused of lawbreaking? This brings us to the third e-mail, which reached us around Thanksgiving:

"Sir" Richard:

I have a headache! Oh Yes, its self-inflicted. I have a nasty habit of "beating my head against the wall."

As I suspected - Jim Baxley was sworn in, as police chief Monday night. It was confirmed by the new chief himself, in conversation this morning. That conversation was interesting to say the least. Some issues were discussed that had me confused. I must say; now I' m totally addled.

I have two complaints on the docket in Municipal Court but there is no magistrate to do the paperwork. Chief Baxley informs that, in the near future, his grandaughter will fill the position. Now we are faced with finding and hiring a Town Clerk. Where will all this money for wages and schooling come from? That's a good question, but there's no good answer.

The Chief and I discussed the matter of morals, character, and their influence on the ability to lead. We agreed that - any individual who holds himself above the law consitutes a poor choice for a leadership role. That brands Rayford Tapley as a prime example.

Mayor Tapley acted inappropriately in his former role as Municipal Court Magistrate. He and a neer-do-well attorney (Ken White) who holds the post of municipal judge have worked in collusion to bend every law that they don't find to their liking. God help anyone who courts their disfavor.

Mayor Tapley left the position of Municipal Court Magistrate in less than good standing. But even as a citizen he "exercised his influence" To break the law. He had a large tree cut on his business property without obtaining the proper permits. He reduced the cost of disposal by dumping the tree-trunks on public property.with the full knowledge that it was WRONG!

Now, issues with another individual who dumped limbs in the same area, have resulted in criminal prosecution. Tapley just chuckles and takes refuge behind the statute of limitations. Is this the mark of a true leader? I think not!

Rayford Tapley didn't run for mayor of "Hurt'sboro because of his high moral fiber, or concern for its citizens. The salary is of no consequence, so nothing's left but a measure of power or his ego.

In my opinion, Mayor Tapley would be held in higher regard if he admitted that he had done wrong, faced the music in court, and worked to clean up the illegal dump he fostered over a year ago!

"Sir" Richard would you consider posting this BIG BLOG QUESTION: " Should Mayor Tapley act responsibly and admit he was guilty of Criminal Littering and pay any fine associated with the act.

Constable R.J. Schweiger

I didn't get into money questions with the Police Chief, since those matters really are up to the Hurtsboro Mayor. And at least the Police Chief talked to me on a Sunday - while the mayor still hasn't returned a call from ten days ago.

Jim Baxley says he checked the facts on Mayor Rayford Tapley's tree. His limbs indeed were dumped at the old Hurtsboro city landfill in August 2007. Isn't this amazing? He didn't bother waiting for a city trash truck to come get them.

But anyway: the new Hurtsboro Police Chief says the tree limb issue wasn't brought to police attention until October of this year - and there's a 12-month statute of limitations on such violations. So is the Hurtsboro Mayor a "true leader?" Every bit as much as U.S. Presidents pardoning convicted criminals, I suppose.

I told Chief Jim Baxley I'd probably receive more complaints from Constable Robert Schweiger. Baxley told me he'd be surprised if Schweiger stopped complaining. After all, Schweiger sent us three e-mails in the week of Thanksgiving. Imagine if our country adopted what Pol Pot's Kampuchea used to have - the "National Day of Hate."

THE BIG BLOG QUESTION admittedly seems rather small - but since nothing else is on the docket, we'll post it. Should the mayor of Hurtsboro pay a criminal littering fine, even though the 12-month statute of limitations has run out? Or is this the sort of dirt his opponent should have exposed before the city election?

BLOG UPDATE: For a change, there was NO Sunday night pre-election TV debate between the candidates for U.S. Senate in Georgia. Jim Martin actually put Columbus ahead of GPB - as if someone told him about the TV and radio reception problems around here.

Jim Martin came to Columbus for a second roundtable discussion on veterans' issues. Unlike the first one, this forum actually seemed to draw a crowd. That's what happens when you hold it at the Democratic Party Headquarters - and when the Falcons game doesn't kick off until 4:00 p.m.

Jim Martin apparently even considered Columbus more important than national television. He was invited to appear with Saxby Chambliss on "Fox News Sunday," but host Chris Wallace said the Democrat turned the offer down. Of course, this made Fox News appear as "fair and balanced" as it normally does....

Saxby Chambliss was asked about that quote in an "attack ad," where he was unsure what a recession means. The Republican explained back in July, we had not yet seen "two consecutive months of negative gross domestic product." Since many experts define a recession as two consecutive QUARTERS, Chambliss still has some work to do.

Saxby Chambliss says Tuesday's Senate runoff is NOT necessarily a referendum on the President-elect. But he added he had a higher vote count than Barack Obama in the general election. Hmmmm -- if Jim Martin is elected, won't this allow Chambliss to spend more time on a 2012 Presidential bid?

SCHEDULED TUESDAY: Your comments about the big college football weekend....

BURKARD BULK MAIL INDEX: 956 (- 48, 4.8%)

The views expressed in this blog are solely those of the author -- not necessarily those of anyone else in Columbus living or dead, and perhaps not even you.