Tuesday, September 21, 2010

21 SEP 10: Meet Me at the Fair

(BLOGGER'S NOTE: We're on vacation, so the blogging pace has slowed for a few days. Today we mark the start of the Greater Columbus Fair, with a look at how we covered fairs past in LaughLine and on this blog.)

29 Sep 00: It's regional fair time in our town. We paid it a visit Thursday night, and were stunned by what we saw. To throw a ball at milk cans, it's now TWO dollars - for ONE ball! Three balls cost five bucks! Those milk cans must be made of sterling silver.

(The "fishy fishy" game also cost two dollars. I'll say something's fishy-fishy about it....)

A civic club in our town is famous at the fair for its foot-long hot dogs. As we waited in line, a woman came up to us and complained, "They gave me hardly ANY chili on my hot dog, and I'm going up there to tell them about it!" We didn't say anything -- but figured later she probably doesn't give anything to the United Way without expecting something back.

("What are those yellow tickets?" the woman asked of the items in our right hand. We offered her a LaughLine business card - but she declined our offer. Perhaps she wouldn't have understood the purpose of it.)

Later at a barbecue booth, we asked for a chicken sandwich. We were stunned to find a leg and breast on white bread - with the chicken still ON the bone! We've heard of crispy chicken sandwiches, but extra-CRUNCHY?

26 Sep 03: The new, improved "Festival at South Commons" opened Thursday evening at the spot of the old "Greater Columbus Fair." So where's the official mascot of the event - a weird-looking creature called "Festive Al?"

Your blogger was first to report about the name being changed from a fair to a festival. [29 Jul] Remember what the Civic Center's spokeswoman said - about no agriculture? So why did they bring in racing pigs, and a park with giraffes?

Greg Hudgison with the Columbus Consolidated Government assured a morning TV interviewer some things have NOT changed, at the new Festival at South Commons. "The foot-long hot dogs are still there," he announced. That's strange - since you'd think the sponsoring Columbus Exchange Club might BE exchanged for something else.

(2010 INSERT: The Exchange Club announced earlier this year it would no longer serve foot-long hot dogs at the fair. Don't be surprised if it's been replaced by a high school math club, measuring hot dogs metrically.)

The Midway is also back at South Commons for the festival. I'm not sure what to think about that. A former Pastor of mine said his wife loved roller coasters - but my current Pastor talks them down so often as risky and harmful, I'm starting to think they're sin.

One of the new items at the first Festival at South Commons is a "Wing Fling" on Saturday. For those of you who haven't heard - this does NOT mean you can win a date with a Cottonmouth hockey player.

One of the bigwigs at the Festival at South Commons has challenged Columbus Councilor Glenn Davis to a "bobbing for chicken wings" contest at the Wing Fling. Truly Davis is turning into a politician - going into a challenge, wide-open mouth first.

The Festival at South Commons is trying to bring in famous musical acts. Saturday night's schedule includes a Civic Center concert by Foreigner - which in this day and age is sure to bring a boycott by military veterans.

Next week's Festival agenda includes open auditions for the CBS reality series "The Amazing Race." Remember, this is a pairs' competition. Come by yourself, and the producers might team you with Brian Sharpe.

(The production crew moves on from there - and next Thursday will look for "Amazing Race' contestants at King Ford in Valley. You'd think they'd simply take Frank and Bubba from the King Ford commercials, without looking for anybody else.)

To offer a story tip, make a PayPal donation, advertise to our readers or comment on this blog, write me - but be warned, I may post your e-mail comment and offer a reply.

BURKARD BULK MAIL INDEX: Suspended for vacation

The views expressed in this blog are solely those of the author -- not necessarily those of anyone else in Columbus living or dead, and perhaps not even you.

© 2003-10 Richard Burkard, all rights reserved.

site stats