24 SEP 10: Spam-Tember
It's break time for us, but this blog isn't shut down completely. Today we invite you to feast on a SPAM-A-RAMA - where we take real titles of recent spam messages, and offer responses to them. As they say on TV, the fast-paced action starts.... right.... well, wait. Can we hold this for Sunday? Oh, I guess not....
"GIVE HER HIGHER HIGHS"
How tall do her heels really need to be?
"REGISTER AND GET INTERNET DEALS FROM INTERNET"
Then I guess I should get flea market deals somewhere else.
"THE MOST IMPORTANT HAIR LOSS DISCOVERY OF OUR TIME"
Some of us call it the ball cap.
"YOUR WIFE PHOTOS ATTACHED"
I'm single - attorney business card attached.
"WELCOME TO WEINER WONDERLAND."
In Columbus, it has to share space with Brewster's Ice Cream.
"DATA ENTRY WORKERS NEEDED WORLDWIDE!!!"
Yet the number of people blogging for free has never been higher.
"MONEY TRANSFER AGENT"
I'm old enough to remember when banks called them tellers.
"BE AN ALPHA MALE."
Too late for me - I didn't eat Alpha Bits cereal when I was young.
"TAX RETURN IN TWO STEPS"
That's an old joke. How much did you earn last year? Send it in.
"EMAIL FOR UNIFORMSTUPIDITY"
That must be a service of John Boy and Billy.
"LONGER AND THICKER SHAFT"
Somehow, I don't think that will stop another oil well explosion.
"DON'T LET THIS PASS YOU BY."
Don't worry -- my car is 16 years old, so I'm used to getting passed.
"SHOULD WE TRANSFER YOUR FUND TO MRS. ANNE ROBINSON?"
No, thank you - she'd only declare my money the "Weakest Link."
"SHARE YOUR CV WITH OVER 3000 RECRUITERS"
A blog about the Chattahoochee Valley isn't enough?
"POWER IN YOUR PANTS"
Usually it's for my camera -- two AA batteries.
"YOUR BALANCE MAY BE RESET"
And then the next play of the football game is run.
"FROM GEN. PETER OLU"
Don't look at me, General - I've never even owned a Quran.
"WELL ENDOWED MAN GIVES TIPS"
They'd better be above 25 percent.
"BAR, WE VISIT REGULARLY"
Often, beer drink they.
"JESSICA BIEL SHOWS IT ALL"
When did she become the host of TMZ?
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BURKARD BULK MAIL INDEX: Suspended for vacation
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© 2003-10 Richard Burkard, all rights reserved.
