20 JUN 08: THE BIG 4-0
No, we're not talking about my age today. But part of me wishes I was. At the place where I'm attending church these days, the options for dating would be much more interesting....
The 40 which gained my interest Thursday came from a health screening team downtown. The workers told me I now officially have a 40-inch waist. Oh dear - that means several pairs of shorts and slacks have NOT shrunk in the wash after all.
The big discovery came when I stopped by the "Take Care" health bus parked next to the Columbus Urban League office. Before you get wrong ideas about this event - no, Reginald Pugh did NOT stand outside the bus holding State Senate campaign flyers.
The Take Care mobile clinic is a partnership between Walgreens and the National Urban League. That's evident by the big Urban League logo at the back entrance to the bus, where you sit to wait for testing. Come to think of it, people at the back of that bus are NOT made to feel guilty by watching old films of Rosa Parks.
Even though I arrived around 12:00 noon, I didn't have to wait long for the free health screenings. This surprised me a bit - because I figured the lunch-hour crowd at Minnie's Uptown Restaurant across the street would want to get checked before eating, for better results.
The first check involved a simple needle-prick of my finger, for a blood test. But the staff member admitted she had trouble getting the blood, because it was on the thick side. Some scientists don't believe the phrase, "Blood runs thicker than water" unless they see it personally.
The blood was taken to figure my glucose level -- and the good news was that it was on the low side. That means no risk of diabetes. It also means there was no sign of the chocolate chip cookies I nibbled before leaving home.
The next booth inside the Take Care bus measured my blood pressure. But it was done in a way I don't recall seeing before. The staff member stepped away, and the wrap around my arm inflated and deflated on its own. The inventors of air bag technology apparently needed some extra money.
My blood pressure is in the acceptable range, which means I don't have hypertension. But here again, timing was everything. If a beggar had stopped me outside the bus, demanding two dollars for lunch....
Then I was given a device to hold at an arm's length in front of my body. I think it was used to figure my "body mass index" - because no sets of letters ever came up for an eye exam, and I didn't notice any car thieves.
The last screening required me to roll down my left sock halfway, and stick my foot in a measuring device. I'm not sure what was the point of this - especially since no water squirted out for a foot-washing.
At the front of the bus came the printout of my results. My body mass index wound up in the "overweight" range. But much to my delight, my cholesterol level was 171 - below the danger line of 200. So please don't tell the staff, but I walked home and ate more chocolate chip cookies.
And believe it or not, my 40-inch waist was considered good in the eyes of the clinic staff. That's the top end of the "goal" circumference for men. Maybe so - but buying larger slacks and shorts will make my chest of drawers only more overstuffed.
I picked up a Walgreens gift bag at the end of the screening. Inside were coupons and samples for everything from vitamins to nicotine gum - and a bottle of "Boost Glucose Control" nutritional drink. It reminds me of the church elder who once handed out those drinks at a disaster site and asked himself, "What is Boost?!" But it makes more sense to me than calling a laundry detergent Cheer.
E-MAIL UPDATE: I stumbled upon the health screening bus, as I was walking to the Government Center to follow up a Blog Exclusive from February....
I am interested in the disposition of the case against Ron Harris. I can not find any information past March of this year. What has happened ?
Brian
We checked court records Thursday, and found nothing beyond 12 March. That's when the former Little League board member waived an arraignment, on charges of sexual exploitation of a child. If only he had merely waved at children in the first place....
In the last two days, we've phoned both the District Attorney's office and the lawyer for Ron Harris. Neither side has called us back. That could mean a legal settlement is in the works. Or it could mean both sides have slam-dunk cases, and they're afraid they might blurt out the name of a surprise witness.
THURSDAY NIGHT IS POKER NIGHT: Through everything from four 2's to a well-timed bluff, I hit a personal record high of 115,000 chips at Lil Kim's Cove. But my big lead evaporated and I finished out of the money in third place. Now I know how Rocco Mediate felt the other day....
(One bizarre hand at the final table found three different players making a full house -- and two of the three wound up being knocked out. The only other place to see that many full houses in the same place is to check out DVD's of the old TV comedy at the library.)
Now for other items of note, from a comfortable final full day of spring....
+ WRBL reported Columbus Council will NOT meet the next two weeks. Well, that's one way to shut up the chronic talkers - from the mayor on down.
+ Columbus Police reported a city garbage truck driver was arrested on marijuana charges. Thaddeus Scott allegedly was caught with two bags of pot in his pocket. Certainly the city can afford a better truck deodorizer than this.
(Police suspect Scott may have sold marijuana to prison inmates, who work on trash pickup crews. This may explain why other inmates do lawn mowing and landscaping work -- they have to learn "weed" is bad.)
+ WRBL reported 52 people were arrested in Columbus, as part of a nationwide criminal crackdown dubbed "Operation Falcon." With a name like this, Michael Vick's prison term cannot end soon enough.
+ The Ledger-Enquirer warned bogus e-mails are being spread around Columbus, claiming someone ran over a cougar at Fort Benning. If it had happened closer to Columbus State University, I might have believed it....
+ Columbus State University announced a donation of 60 new pianos to the Schwob School of Music. If my math is right, the foundation making this gift is in line to receive 5,280 keys to the city.
+ Troy Public Radio's "Community Focus" interviewed Auburn marathon runner Heather Walker. She competed at the Olympic trials in Boston in April, and was a bit fearful of running alongside Joan Benoit Samuelson. Walker says she didn't want to trip a marathon legend - even though that sort of thing made Zola Budd famous years ago.
+ Instant Message to Pastor Eddie Wren of Butler First Baptist Church: Did I hear you right - that every time "strong drink" is mentioned in the Bible, it's in negative terms? Then don't stop with the package liquor vote in July. Try to get caffeinated coffee banned, too.
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