12 APR 06: MR. CLEAN

Victory came at about 11:30 this morning, in our annual Serious Spring Cleaning. For more than five weeks I've been filling trash bags, dusting off all sorts of items -- and waking up more hideouts of cockroaches than I honestly expected.

The church denomination I attend practices the Biblical "Days of Unleavened Bread," and we tend to take it very seriously. We even clean toasters of leaven -- and so there I was in the kitchen Tuesday night being a C.S.I.: Crumb Scene Investigator.

The kitchen is usually the last thing in my home to be cleaned. Today's final tasks included clearing out the refrigerator - and if Atlanta TV news anchor Monica Kaufman is reading this, I remember an offhand remark you made several years ago. Some single guys DO have more than a couple of things in refrigerators....

The refrigerator cleaning meant dumping one item which had sat untouched for months. I wouldn't have given that bag of rotten apples to horses....

One big change in my kitchen cleaning this year was that I dumped a lot of empty plastic containers - the ones supermarket bakeries use to hold sweet rolls and cookies. I thought they could make nice storage boxes. But chocolate chip-scented neckties might puzzle some people.

As my last blog entry probably made clear, I try to recycle as much as I can during spring cleaning. This morning brought one more stop at the metal recycling center - this time with a bag of aluminum foil. All those Hershey's Kisses wrappers can add up, you know.

(But the price of foil is only five cents a pound - so the woman behind the window didn't even bother checking for my picture ID. Somehow she doubts police will come after me over a nickel.)

The final round of recycling also meant my third stop in about two weeks at the Valley Rescue Mission. The people there would appreciate your donations of paper and plastic bags. And unlike Publix stores, the mission doesn't discriminate - as black and dark blue plastic bags are accepted.

Because of commitments to the workplace, this blog and other projects, it takes me more than five weeks to clean and de-leaven everything in my home. Cleaning the car took about two hours - but at least the change I dropped between the seats seems like an interest payment.

Now let's put the vacuum cleaner away for a while, and catch up on some news from the last couple of days:

+ I filled my tank with gas for $2.58 a gallon, right as prices were jumping about a dime all over Columbus. When a station on a corner has a posted price of $2.59 in one direction and $2.70 the other direction [true/4th and Veterans], it's time to hurry.

(If the predictions about higher gas prices are right, the winner of Friday's $220 million Mega Millions jackpot might be able to fill up an SUV three times.)

+ Phenix City Police arrested several people who had a methamphetamine lab at the Regency Inn on the 280 Bypass. Hmmm - does that mean it's OK to stay at the Center City Motel again?

+ The Ledger-Enquirer reported plans are in the works for up to 700 new homes in Fort Mitchell. Maybe that will finally get a traffic light at U.S. 431 and Highway 165 -- either that, or someone will put blinking crosses on every corner of the intersection.

+ Voters in Auburn overwhelmingly supported using tax money for an expanded city library. I didn't realize the Auburn University library was so overflowing with city visitors....

+ WRBL news anchor Blaine Stewart admitted during the 5:00 p.m. news he has NOT started on his income taxes yet. Way to go, Creshon Saunders - put him in his place by calling him "Mr. Problem Solver."

+ The Columbus Catfish won their home opener at Golden Park, chewing up Charleston 3-1. I've never seen so many signs on businesses promoting opening night - as if the owners haven't heard the stories about the Catfish moving to South Carolina next year.

+ Instant Message to Goody's on Bradley Park Drive: Nice try - putting those cups of punch and trays of cookies just inside the front door. I read the sign ON the door, saying no eating and drinking are allowed. Will we see pictures of the violators on "Dateline NBC" before long?

COMING SOON: Why did the Catholic buy boxes of matzos?.... and a brand new blog from "Wunderdog...."

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